Merry Christmas Everyone

The house and food are ready. The kids are excited and we have much to do today and tomorrow.

Even my festive flowers look fabulous!

I just wanted to send a quick Christmas Greeting to all my lovely blog friends whom have been great friends and very supportive over the past year.

It hasn't been the best but certain points in life during 2011 have made me ever more value what and who I DO have in my life.

I may do a 2011 review between Christmas and new year, but we'll see.

I have to admit I have been rather emotional this week. It will be the first Christmas without my grandad and he was a big part of our Christmas, especially the day after when we would spend the day at his and my nans. He would do all the food, all the decorating and well, this year, it's all over to ours.

I was writing a card to my nan last night and it didn't feel right writing it to her alone. I got very teary doing so and more so when I was telling hubby I wanted to take the camera to his grandparents today (it's his nans birthday) to get more pictures of them alone and with the kids. This year has taught us not to take people for granted. Things can change in an instant.

It wasn't helped by the fact it would have been my grandparents 60th wedding anniversary this week running up to Christmas. We visited my nan as I didn't like the idea of her being alone all day and she did well under the circumstances. I am just  a big soppy girl deep down and worry about her more than ever these days and I know Christmas is going to be far  from easy for her but we'll get by. We have to. He'd be the last person who wanted us to be feeling down over Christmas so this year I will raise a glass to all those who we have lost this year.

Wishing you all a wonderful Christmas with those that mean the most to you all. It's what Christmas is all about after all. x

All Set For Christmas

In a matter of days we will be celebrating Christmas.

All presents are bought, wrapped and ready to go.

The turkey is in the freezer. The veg are keeping cold in the outhouse.

The remainder of the food shop will be done on Friday when hubby and I can look round the shops without the children.

I have my Christmas dress ready.

The cupboard under the stairs is FULL of nothing but the kids presents and we still have a few more to come.

The smaller the children it appears the bigger the toys. All boxes are rather large.

The kids are getting excited.

So am I!

Today has been a day of catching up on housework and sorting out some toys to go upstairs and making room for presents under the tree.

Our weekend away was fabulous as normal. The kids loved it. We watched many shows but the best was the Christmas one they did. It was the traditional tale of "The Night Before Christmas" and became an extravaganza of Christmas songs. The kids loved it and it became a big Karaoke thing by the end. It was a lot of fun and very magical. Especially when it started snowing in the venue. The tree above was one of the very many decorative trees we saw.

Tonight my friend Kate is coming over for dinner and then we are having a girls night out as we wander up the village for a few festive drinks. I quite fancy some mulled wine!

It's about more than just blood

Last night I was really affected by a tv program. It's not very often that I get upset watching tv but last night I was incredibly tearful watching a documentary.

The topic on this documentary?

Adoption.

The kids in care that they featured seemed so happy and so good that my heart broke for them that they didn't have the normal family life that many of us take for granted. Three sets of foster parents were featured in which there were two sisters. A brother and two sisters and a four year old boy and this program really broke my heart.

If I can do anything worthwhile in my life, I want to help kids like these.

I don't know if I would be strong enough to be a foster parent and actively help in finding such kids a new family. I really wish I could be that good a person to help make a difference and be the stop gap to a better life for them.

Just seeing these 6 kids on tv for an hour has really got me feeling for kids alot less fortunate than my own.

I've always dreamt of having a big family. I'd love more children and I would love to help kids like this along the way. I love the idea of adopting, I love the idea of fostering, I just don't know if I can be tough enough to give kids the love and support they need then let them move on to elsewhere. It must be so rewarding to bring a little stability into some kids lives whether it be short or long term.

My aunt and uncle have been fostering for years. One child they had from a few weeks old and had to give him back to his birth mother last Christmas, just before he turned 4. His mum was a recovering drug addict. The dad was not around. I don't know if I could do that. My personal feelings shouldn't matter if the childs interests are at heart but there will always be a part of me that felt resentful to the parent for letting that child be in the childcare system in the first place.

The 4 year old boy on the tv had been in care since he was a baby and his mum gave him up for adoption. He was in care for 3 years before being adopted. After a few months, his adoptive parents changed their mind and he went back to his foster parents. They then started the process of adopting him themselves along with the two teenage girls they had already adopted.The family were given the go ahead and his "sisters" cried with joy. Midway through the process, his mu who he hadn't met contested it and wants him back. She is now in a new relationship with another child and is on the Social Services Child Protection Register but because she is his mother she has certain rights!

This is where I am disgusted with the system! That poor little boy has a loving family who want to make it official but the mother can try to stop it. This boy has a family, he has a good home, he has a school, he has friends and he could lose it all.

The program ended with the two sisters being adopted to a childless couple. The brother with 2 sisters will find out what their future holds after christmas - with the possibility of them being separated. And the four year old will find out in March if he gets to keep his family or if he will be forced back into the care of his mother.

The whole thing really made me want to do more in the coming years. I've said about it before and I continue to think that this is where I see my life going in future years. I love kids, I love helping others and if I can make a difference to the lives of others when they most need it then that must be SO rewarding as a human.

So the plan remains the same, buy the house, build an extension and apply to do something to help others. Whether it be adopting and giving a child a home for life or fostering and being the step between where they need the most love and affection then I'm in it.

I've never had aspirations for a career. I've only ever wanted a good sized family and to help people. I think I have found my calling and I will be making proper applications when I can.

Another Phase Ended

It's official.

James no longer attends Playgroup and as of January I will be dropping 2 little boys off at the primary school every morning. How did this happen? How did my baby grow so fast?

He enjoyed his last morning at his playgroup and I am glad I no longer have to face that woman any more. Her son may still be at Matthews school but she rarely picks him up and if she does she blanks most people anyway so I no longer have to bite my tongue and paint on a fake smile.

Today is Matthews school Christmas dinner and he was really looking forward to it. He certainly looked good today following his haircut yesterday evening.

My little scruffbag before:

My handsome big man afterwards.

The end of term has come round fast but that's not a bad thing. 2011 has not been the best year for many and I hope that 2012 will bring lots of better news for so many people.

Before and After

Today my little men underwent a bit of a transformation. Instead of getting haircuts Thursday we saw a gap in the barbers and took full advantage.

Yesterday my lovely little twosome looked like this:

Part of me loves Liams long locks, he has the looks and personality to pull it all off.

But 40 minutes of our lovely barber womans time and I have the most handsome little fellas.

James style especially REALLY suits him. He has the same style as Matthew now which is good. This picture isn't actually the tender cuddly moment it appears to be. As soon as I took this photo James started crying as Liam was actually biting his finger!

After school it will be Matthews turn for a haircut and boy does he need it. I will once again get before and after photos and the same with my haircut on Friday.

This is how I looked yesterday BEFORE I dyed my hair a medium brown colour. I preferred the reddish tones but this colour will look better in a couple of days when it's more settled. That's half the job done just need the cut.

I severely need a touch of style again not to mention the hair straighteners. I may be happy with the length, but it's wavy, straggly and shapeless and I look like poo with no make up.  So a mini makeover is certainly due.

New Years Resolution 1 - Trust My Instincts More

It is very rare that I find people I don't like.

It is even more rare that I should take an instant dislike to someone from the moment I meet them.

They say first impressions last and they do. However, I am the type of person to give everyone a chance to prove me wrong. To give them a chance for me to bow my head and admit that I was wrong and that I was wrongfully judgemental.

A few months back I wrote about a certain person who lives in the village that I really did not like. She was very sure of herself, very pushy, persuasive and just annoyed the hell out of me because of her over the top mannerisms. She really was far too self confident for her own good and I really did not feel a connection with her. Yet, despite my misgivings, I gave friendship a go to ignore my gut feelings and get to know her before I judged her. She works at James's playgroup so thought for his sake I should not let my initial feelings bother me and try to get on for HIS sake.

This is where I really wish I had listened to my first instincts.

My first impressions are RARELY wrong. If I think someone seems a bit of bitch, then generally they are!

Last week Liam was supposed to have a hospital appointment and that was booked for a Wednesday. It is the only day James goes to pre-school so I asked if he could go on a different day instead. I didn't even suggest which day and Madam says all days are now full. 2 weeks ago they were struggling for numbers and did not know if they would be re-opening after christmas. Ok, I think to myself - maybe she's having a bad day and gave her the benefit of a doubt. (Incidently that appointment has been put back to January 13th due to being booked in with the wrong consultant)

Now this week, upon leaving nursery this week I ask if the Christmas party is open to all and if I could bring Liam like I did for the summer party. That was an extravagant affair where all kids in the village were invited and it was a lovely day! She was hesitant. So I said that's ok, I just didn't know the set up but would James still be able to go since it wasn't his normal day for going but I assumed that the party was for all the toddlergroup kids since it was mentioned in the newsletter and they had a huge poster outside advertising it. Again, she was hesitant and said probably not. Then she quickly corrected herself and said she would have to check and find out! Surely this should have been her first response and not an afterthought?

I AM taking it very personally. Everything was FINE until we decided to switch schools. Now if she has a problem with me about that then that's fine but I don't expect my 3 year old son to miss out on things like his Christmas party because of MY choices. I am incredibly angry about this and feel that the kids should be treated equally and a Christmas party should be for EVERY child that attends that group. It's his last session at Playgroup on Wednesday and the party is Thursday. Out of principal now, if we are offered a place at the party I will refuse. I don't believe kids should be shunned because of one member of staff who can't be bothered to find out there and then if he can go and makes it clear she really doesn't care!

I understand the toddlergroup is in trouble with getting enough kids to go but it was partially because of that reason that James is getting into Matthews school. I know he'll get in and it won't be a mad rush if the playgroup closes for a number of kids to get into the local school. I am just putting my kids first.

SO..... If I am so unhappy with this member of staff why am I not complaining to her boss? Because her mum is her boss and she's a lovely woman. I feel bad for her mum that her job is at risk but that doesn't excuse the way my child has been victimised in this instance. Plus, like I said there is only 1 more week for him but I thought the party would be a nice way for his time at the playgroup to end on a high. It appears others don't think that way.

So I am really disappointed in James's toddlergroup. I will NOT be recommending it to others and I very much doubt I will be sending Liam there after Easter if this woman still works there. It's not worth the aggro and I'd rather avoid this woman at all costs.

A new year resolution will be to trust my instincts. To not feel bad if I don't like someone. To not try to befriend them and to accept that some people are really not worth the effort.

Simple Things That Make A Mum A Happy Mum

This Christmas the focus is all on the kids. The excitement they feel and show in the run up is proving to be so much fun. James really is understanding so much more than he did last year and Liam is constantly shouting "Issstmas!!!" every time we walk past somewhere decorated with lights or an adorned shop window. Liam doesn't fully understand but he is getting excited. He loves the toy adverts on tv and does a special little dance for Christmas music. He is so funny.

James is taking much more interest than ever before and is able to tell us clearly what he wants for Christmas this year. Mainly the two Fireman Sam toys he hasn't got and some Playmobil which he has recently discovered.

The magic for Matthew really is not there this year. He knows that Santa/Father Christmas is not real. He said he had suspicions last year too. That boy cracks me up. In a way it's better now he knows that we buy and give the go ahead to his presents. He knows that if he's good for us then we will make sure that he gets good presents.  Haha, yes, we are fantastic bribers us parents!

I myself will not be getting much on Christmas day. I have been a tad spoilt this week instead. Hubby has bought me a new winter coat and BOY do I need it. The temperatures have really dropped the past few days but I am holding off wearing it until next week when we go away for the weekend. It's nice to have something smart and new to wear for special occassions.

It is very similar to this and will keep me warm this winter. It ends at mid thigh length so it's a really good length on me.

I have also been given money from my mum and dad to buy myself some clothes. I purchased a new pair of black boots with chunky heels and a black bra and a lovely twinset of vest and pants. Black with red roses! Nothing makes a woman feel better than something sexy but subtle. My style entirely! Sexy and understated! And I like to look at a nice little bit of lingerie as a present for both myself and hubby.

With the remaining money I have booked myself in for a good haircut the morning before we go away. I am only going to get a trim, a few more layers and my hair lightened up from feeling so heavy. I don't want a drastic restyle. I love the length, I just want it easier to work with and to look good! I am going to be rather pampered and I should hope feeling rather good on my mini break! Just what a mummy needs at Christmas.

I may even do something shocking and go for my first ever beauty treatment by getting my eyebrows done professionally! A nice shape and wax may really be good for me.

I can't wait to feel a bit more pampered and feminine. You do NEED to feel it sometimes with a houseful of males and what better a time for a little makeover and feelgood factor than the miserable cold months and the magic of Christmas!

Christmas is Getting Close - Hooray

Even if I didn't have kids, I would still be excited about the prospect of Christmas looming.

This week we've really been into our Christmas crafts.  This is a picture post so I hope you enjoy!

James decorated the pine cones.

 He wore Matthews old plastic apron that has been saviour many a time through the years.

 Then with our pine cones and the basics of white glue, paintbrushes, gold glitter and ribbon we set to work.

 Originally we were both painting on glue but it was a very slow process so I became cheif gluer and James became official glitterer!

James did enjoy playing with the glitter and did a really good job,

That same evening Matthew had a go at doing some crafts. His job was to do the paper chains:

He sat himself down and really got to the task in hand.

As the chain grew, so did his confidence. He really enjoyed doing this and made the full pack of 100 adhesive paper strips.

My job was the cookie baking. I found an old easter chick cutter that in this case became a Christmas robin.

I made a basic water and sugar icing (glaze) and covered the cookies with a layer of the glaze and on one side covered them with some 100's and 1000's sprinkles.

Next I threaded the ribbon throught the cookies and coated the other side with same glaze before adding some star decorations and the remainder sprinkles when the stars ran out.

 Hubbys part in all this was to get the tree. He went to a local tree sales place and bought a lovely 8ft tree for a VERY good price. This is where high ceilings are a real treat!

 We went out and picked our new lights. White flashy ones and James got in the spirit by wearing some paper chains.

This is the finished article. Our Homemade tree decorations. We feel that the Angel on top doesn't quite suit it but it will do for this year.

Of course, I have missed out on one little person and his participation in the Christmassing up of the house. Liam just said "Wow" and "I like Dat!" in all the right places. That's all my little boy needs to do to show me he approves and has enjoyed seeing all the bustle of the house in the past 4 days.

I have enjoyed the experience doing this but I think next year it will save a lot of time and money to buy decorations to reuse. We can still make the paper chains and reuse the cones. This is one of those things I always wanted to do as a kid but never got to do. My kids will never say the same! It may be good to do something similar in a couple of years so Liam can participate more.