New Month New Tactics New Hopes

So with the first month of 2011 gone, I am 11lb lighter.

That's a great start if I do say so myself. I know it doesn't get any easier though and it's a journey that is ongoing.

Good things take time. Good things are worth the hard work.

I am slipping back every now and then but I will not give in. I am having "treats", sometimes more than I should have but the results are what is important. I am loosing it and that's all that matters. If I have a week I stay the same or put on I sure as hell will work twice as hard the week after.

As much as we all try, blips happen on every diet every now and then. Some weeks we can work our butts off for no change or a gain. Sometimes these things just happen. I've not had that just yet so I am not letting it get to me.

However, to make sure things don't get put of control, I've upped my exercise to 40km a day on the cycle. That's an extra 1/3 on what I was doing and burns an extra 150 cals a day. It's a little extra. I would like to loose 8lb this coming month and I know I need to work at it so I'm hoping all goes well with the extra exercise. I enjoy it. I'm getting through 2 books a week with it. I'm listening to motivational music. I love it.

I'd love to get through February and have completed my 20lb target a month early but we'll see how it goes. It's a short month, I refuse to get my hopes too high.

Have a good week all. x

Belief

A recent study showed that the majority of Britiah people believe in some form of after life. 66% believe in ghosts and 1 in 5 Brits have seen a ghost.

Reading this reminded me of a story I never did share.

Something recent that neither me or hubby can explain but it was eerie.

It was either Christmas night or the following night and we had been back to Colchester to visit family.

We drove home in the dark, snow covered the fields and countryside, the roads were clear of snow and ice but we still drove on the cautious side.

About 5 minutes from home we were on the bypass that stopped people driving through the village unnecessarily as the road is normally quite clear.

We almost stopped the car as we were on the clear straight road. Suddenly in front of us was an extremely dense patch of "fog".

"What the hell is that?" I asked upon seeing it.

Hubby first thought it was a car broken down in the middle of the road with no lights on. But as we cautiously drove on, it didn't move.

The patch was about 3 foot wide and about 5 foot tall and a rectangular shape.

"Did you see that?" He asked as we slowly drove through it. He had been driving for a living for a few years and said he'd never seen anything like that before.

"I thought a car was stopped there" he added.

"I thought it looked like an old fashioned cart that was pulled by horses. It wasn't touching the ground" I replied. The size and the shape were just right. All about it just seemed so odd.

It could have been fog, that's the sensible conclusion.

After all we were driving through open fields on a dark foggy night, but it was incredibly bizarre for us both to think it looked like a vehicle.

The road we were driving along was a road that came out at The Bull Hotel. (I've written about this before.)  It is the most Haunted building in my neck of the woods. It's a former coach house that was home of a murder in the 1640's. That ghost still roams the grounds. Could some lost spirit still have been making it's way to the old coach house?

I've tried to do some research on the road we travelled along to see if it was a former dirt road like alot of main roads were before they became made of tarmac.

It's one of those things I will never really know about.

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Finally I got 2lb off. I'm happy with that.

I was stressed but any loss is always good news.  I could have had a better week.I could always have a better week but I have always allowed myself a day off the diet. (Yes, I do a six day week on weight loss!) Not to massive excess but a day to just not worry about counting Cals so much. This is normally on a weigh day or the day after so I have the rest of the week to compensate.

Life Is Like A Box Of Chocolates - A Passage Of Self Therapy

My ex husband was an alcoholic.

If he had a good day, if he was happy, if he was angry, upset or bored he'd have a drink.

He had an addiction and I sometimes find myself in the same boat with food.  Before you switch off this isn't JUST a diet post.

Part of a successful diet includes being honest with yourself.

Yesterday I had a bad day.

I didn't cycle because I hurt a muscle in my thigh. I felt a little down about that. I wanted to do it but I thought a day of rest would do me good.

I then find myself getting very hurt by a friends comment on facebook. I over-ate. Out of anger, sadness and boredom. I had a bit of a chocolate binge. (A toffee Crisp and 4 chocolate biscuits! I DID stop myself from more) The more I ate the worse I felt.

Today I am back with a new look for a new day. I have done 40km on my exercise bike. Partly because I feel I want to catch up on what I missed out on and partly because it acts as stress relief for me! It gives me time to think, to assess, to work things through. It doesn't only banish the fat in time but it also banishes the negative feelings.

I first started cycling after my marriage fell apart. The ex husband would phone, usually abusive and I would end up in tears. If not through the verbal abuse I'd be in tears with anger and hatred. The more I cycled the more I felt like I "was kicking him in the balls" and refusing to let him have a hold over my life when we apart. It became my outlet for relieving the stress. I'd feel so much better afterwards.

Today has been the same. I've been through some feelings regarding a certain friendship and feel that I need to get away from it for my own sanity.  I can only be let down so many times. I can only take so many sarcastic comments and I can only give so much. Right now, the effort doesn't seem worth it.

Forrest Gump famously said "Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you are going to get"

I say "Some friends are like a box of chocolates. You can only have so much before they make you sick!"

Family Roundup.

Before I become a diet bore, I thought I would update on the family.

Hubby recently had his diabetic appointment and had all his bloods assessed and for the first time ever he is into single figures. 9.7 or something very close. The hospitals aim is to get him to around 7 so though it is still higher than it should be, it's progress. He is heading in the right direction and I am very proud of him. I do think that regular mealtimes and more of a routine with his new job is helping no end. When he was first diagnosed he was hospitalised with VERY high blood levels in the high 20's and he had a form of blood poisoning because of this. He's only been in once more in the 20 months he's been diagnosed. That was after moving house last year and he was stressed. He hadn't been taking the best care of the condition but he's been much better in recent months and I am pleased for him that his blood tests reflect this. I want him to feel like he's doing well. I know what it's like to plough on at something and not see instant results. I am very proud of him.

My kids are as wonderful as ever. Matthew is just Matthew. He's a happy go lucky, confident 7 year old. At school they are currently doing exams and his teacher said he is doing very well with them. The writing is slowly improving but his concentration span is short sometimes.

James is feeling more and more grown up. The famous tantrums of the Terrible Two's are sparse. He's had two in the 3 months since he turned 2 so we are expecting him to catch up soon. His speech is very good, he loves to be out and about walking around and we do have major tears if he has to go back in the buggy at any point. He joins in more than ever when we go to the singing group and is really getting confident too. I love to see him progress.

Liam can take 4-6 steps now without walking. His confidence still isnt quite there but he can get into the big toy car and wander round the room in that. He can push it so he is RUNNING from one end of the room to the other, he just wont let go! He is the sweetest little boy right now. He will come over to me, put his head on my leg for a cuddle and grab my hand for kisses.

All my 3 are really affectionate little boys and I love that.

Next month, hubby is away for a couple of days to do some training for work in the Midlands. He's away 2 nights, that really will feel odd. It's around Valentines Day time as well so I will be doing us a nice special romantic meal the following weekend. I am stuck on a menu though, I am pretty sure of my starter. I want to do scallops with garlic, chilli and lemon on a bed of salad but for the rest of the meal, thats tougher. Maybe some sort of rich casserole with roasted new potatoes and herbs finished off with some baby veg, Dessert is where I always struggle most, I don't do desserts at all. I am not a person with much of  a sweet tooth at all.

I still have a couple of weeks to plan!

Calculating.

I worked it out the school run for me is a 2 mile round trip. This twice a day, 5 times a week means I do a minimal of 20 miles (32km) a week in walking alone.

I then cycle 30km, (18.6 miles) 5 times a week.

53 minutes if cycling therefore equates 10 hours of walks with the buggy. Phew.

Now before people begin to be disillusioned by the idea that I am superwoman, I had a big fat Indian takeaway last night. Not going into details it was very high cal but I loved it. I am only human and I need treats occassionally too. Proper treats!

That's my half a stone (7lb) reward to myself.

New day new week, off we go.

Almost Halfway

Today is the third Saturday in January.

I have lost another 3lb this week!

That's a grand total of 9lbs lost since the new year.

I am 11lb away from my target of 20lb. (For newer readers, my intention was to complete this mini 20lb goal by my holiday-. I go April 4th)

If I could do it by the end of next month that would be amazing and my 20lb challenge would be completed a month early.

My next challenge will be a 5% loss of my weight and I will continue that from there on.

I have also updated one of my blinkies.... It now says I have lost 60lb (Ok, 1lb more and I will have lost 60lbs, but whats 1lb? It will be off next week, dont you worry.)

I am also out of the "extremely obese" category and down to the "obese" woohoo!!

I am confident to do another 2lb at least next week. I am enjoying my lifestyle as it is right now, I think it suits me.

Do You Ever.....

Do you ever just have one of those days where everything just feels perfect?

That's how I feel today. Though it isn't even lunchtime yet so I am not holding out for it lasting all day.

Right now I feel fabulous.

Upbeat radio station on.

Sun is shining.

Did my daily 30km on my exercise bike.

Felt so good I did another 10.

And I have the best husband and kids in the world.

2011 - The Year For Health

I must say that yesterday my heart skipped a beat or two and my stomach did a major flip.

As the post arrived I found a letter addressed to me from the hospital.

It had been exactly 7 days since my smear test.

I recieved a hospital letter exactly 7 days after the last one so I was eager but worried about opening the letter.

It took 2 reads to make sense of it all as there was so much unneccessary information in one letter.

All I needed was the first line which I somehow skimmed over first read.

"I am writing to inform you that your cervical screening test taken on 12.01.2011 was normal."

I was thrown by the dates beneath it. I automatically assumed the worst thinking I was in for a hospital appointment but no, they scared me with future dates on when my next test is due.

Because I had to have the colposcopy and potentially dangerous cells removed, I have another smear test due on July 12th.  Every six months isn't ideal but I suppose I will get used to it. In a way I suppose it's better than once every 5 years. When you get used to something it seems less of a deal.

I really want to appreciate life.

I want to appreciate health.

I am in good health so far and I have no medical conditions though I know I may be prone to a whole list of them in the future. My family history has it all, heart disease, cancers, diabetes, high cholestrol, IBS.

I don't smoke, I rarely drink - Ok, I may binge when I do but once every couple of months isn't too bad. I'm old enough now to know when enough is enough. Who actually made the rule that anything beyond 2 large glasses of wine is binge drinking? Stupid rule! Hahaha.

*Side Thought - Grapes are fruit and are good for you. Wine is made of grapes therefore that must also be good for you. How many glasses of wine equate a portion of grapes? The world would be a better place if I could write the nutrition books but there'd be more alcoholics out there too I should imagine*

My only problem is my weight. Which is something I am working on. I will do it, I am in no doubt of that. I don't want to be a perfect size 10, I am not doing it because I am vain but because I have a family. I want to have as few health worries as possible as I age. I don't want them worrying about me as I get older. I want more confidence and in the end I want them to be as proud of me as I am of them.

*Finally, I have discovered 2 new blogs I love that also track the tribulations of weight loss. Well I should say these sisters found me, but one is doing a giveaway. If you would like to have a look go and visit : Robin