Surfer Dudes

I can't believe it's been almost a week since I last posted.

James has recovered tremendously well. He looks completely normal again now. His face is back as it was with no signs of any injury. The only indication of his fall is when he opens his mouth wide and it looks like his two top teeth are missing but they are still there. Just high up.

The hospital appointment went very well. They were happy with the way he was healing and his teeth were still secure. We saw the same dental specialist as at the hospital on the Saturday and they were satisfied with their checks. He has to go back this Tuesday for a further check up. He may need to have them removed over time but not sure when. They would rather not do it, but if it's needed it's needed.

The rest of the week seems to have flown by. School holidays really do keep mummys busy. We took the kids to a local toy expo and toy shop, a local pet shop, visited family etc. The normal things....

We also bought the two little ones some surf suits for when we go away next week. James has this suit with yellow edging and Liam has this red one. It REALLY does suit the surfer dude look! I'm sure there will be pictures in a couple of weeks when we return.

The toddler group kept it's Friday Stay and Play session going this week despite it being the holidays. That was great for the kids to get out and socialise for the morning. I think it does them all good to continue mixing with other kids and it breaks the week up a little and makes it easier for me to find something to do with them.

Annoyingly, the one week I REALLY wanted to lose weight I've put on 1lb. It's been a rollercoaster of a week where it has been harder to plan and what with missing the daily exercise of the school run it has all added up. I know I've also overdone the carbs and been comfort eating.  As long as I've lost more than 5kg at the docs on Tuesday I will be happy. It's a move in the right direction.

From Elation to Being Purely Terrified

Whilst having kids is the most amazing rewarding thing in the world, it can also be the most terrifying.

From starting the day amazingly, yesterday turned into a nightmare.

It was just before 4pm and James asked for a drink, when I came back in the room, he was crying, not loud but he looked scared, he looked panicked. I saw his mouth was bleeding. Lots and lots of blood.

Matthew said he thought he'd fell.

I've never seen so much blood, looking in his mouth the flesh between the lip and gum was torn and his two top teeth had been pushed back into his gum. I was a little hysterical as James by now was screaming but I called the out of hours doctors. They phoned back within seconds and reccommended I took him to the local Accident and Emergency Department as he may need a stitch. Hubby was at work and I had the two others at home so the doctor recommended I called an ambulance.

Within 2 minutes of getting off the phone to an ambulance centre, our first car turned up. The paramedic was lovely, he managed to calm James down enough so he could have a look and we gave him some kids medicine to calm any pain. He then sat on the sofa whilst mummy ran around trying to get a neighbour to look after Liam and Matthew for a while. I phoned my mum and asked her to collect the boys from the neighbour as they were going out later as I didn't have any idea when hubby would be home from work.

The proper ambulance arrived, blue lights flashing and the ambulance crew came in to find a calm little boy behaving himself wonderfully. The first paramedic said we would be better off going straight to Addenbrookes hospital in Cambridge since they were more specialised in childrens care and that if he needed to see a dental specialist regarding his teeth, he wouldn't need to be transferred.

We didn't go in the ambulance but in the rapid response vehicle. James loved it as it was the same type of car as ours. He took a Fireman Sam Fire Engine and Peppa Pig car to the hospital along with his special blanket. He did fall asleep on the way up there and where his head tilted, he was left with a big dry patch of blood including the odd clot all over his cheek.

The staff at the hospital were amazing! They got James settled very quickly. Hubby phoned to say he was on his way to us and we didn't seem to wait long at all to see a nurse, closely followed by an expert in facial injuries. We were told the blood made it look much worse than it was so James had his face and mouth cleaned out and I was shown how to stop the blood flow. I was doing this when hubby arrived. We'd been in the hospital less than an hour in total and had been seen by 2 nurses and a specialist. Once the specialist was satisfied the bleeding had stopped we were allowed to leave.

Regarding his teeth, the specialist said they would probably fall out of their own accord. They could give him general anaesthetic but the downfalls outweigh the benefits of leaving it to nature. We were also told to give him cold soft food for the next few days such as yogurts, rice pudding etc. and were given a follow up appointment for Monday morning to see how he is healing.

Coming home, James was a little sick. He was bringing up brown blood clots. This was probably alot of the blood he had swallowed and we were aware it may happen.  Besides looking very pale he seemed fine. We called in a Supermarket on the way home to get James some soft food, more kids paracetamol and we treated him to some new Cars pj's.

We arrived home to my mum and nan looking after Matthew, Liam was already in bed.

James still kept bleeding on and off but the hospital gave me plenty of gauze to stop the blood flow.

Overnight James appeared to lose alot of blood. I was worried. I hadn't eaten last night out of stress, I couldn't sleep and by 2.30am I was in tears because of the blood and the clots all over his bed, his face, in his hair and felt so useless. I wanted to stop the bleeding, I wanted to stop worrying. Worrying about his injury, his breathing, what if his mouth/throat closed up and restricted his airways? Everything goes through your mind although you know the Doctors are great at their jobs and they wouldn't have released him from hospital if they didn't think he was fit. Also the mouth doesn't lose much blood, it's mostly mixed with saliva so it looks worse than it is. But mummy's worry no end!  His lip was majorly swollen. James kept pushing me away as he just wanted to sleep. Eventually, he let me do it and he had his first drink in hours. That reassured me enough so I was able to sleep for a few hours.

At 6.30 he was in the bath. Blood was everywhere. He reminded me of The Joker from Batman but it was blood. A good clean later and fresh water in the bath and he was looking like James again, not like he'd been at the centre of a massacre. The swelling had gone down on his upper lip and I realised as I was stopping the blood flow again that he's lost one of the teeth. I think it's probably best to lose them sooner rather than later so it doesn't heal and then he suffers later.

Now, a couple of hours later he seems completely back to normal. He's just polished off 4 mini fromage frais yogurts and I've not had to stop him bleeding since we were in the bath so fingers crossed, his little body is mending very quickly.

Unfortunately I don't think we will ever get to the bottom of what he did. The doctors and paramedics said it looked like a fall but James wont really tell us what happened.

Today is going to be a peaceful day in with lots of hugs and cuddles to my little ones. The special blanket is in the washing machine as we speak getting rid of any blood stains (along with the brand new pyjamas) so we can soon have cuddles with "Car-Car". I do expect any poos today to be tinged with brown blood and possibly clots, if he's swallowed blood it will need to come out one way or another.

Here's to a better day today.

20lb Down

That's right peeps, I am 2/3 of the way there.

I still have a month to go before the end of my summer challenge deadline.

Full of the joys of being 20lb lighter, feeling more confident and happier with my body and it's abilities to lose weight has had me on the exercise bike bright and early this morning. Confidence is a great motivator.

I have been doing things differently.

I CAN NOT quit complex carbs 100%, I need them. I've cut right back but I cannot live without them or I snack terribly. I need something to line my stomach which doesn't turn to water within a few hours.

I have pasta once a week, rice twice a week (Half the portions I used to eat) and I rarely eat potatoes. I also eat couscous with vegetables at least 3 times a week whether it be as a lunch or a main meal.

The thing I can't quit is bread. I probably eat more bread than I should but it keeps my blood sugars stable and prevents me snacking.

Today for example is planned as follows:

1/2 pint  1% milk

1 slice of toast with butterlike spread

Prawn salad with 1 white roll (no spread) homemade low fat seafood sauce.
A banana

Chicken Fajitas (2 wraps) with salad.

It is alot of wheat but I simply can't give up everything. My favourite breads contain seeds, poppy seeds are the flavour of the month but anything granary is always a winner with me. I love grains and seeds and they are high in fibre so I'm not missing out on nuitrition.

It's my first target date in 10 days and I want to stand on the scales in the nurses room and for her to be shocked in a nice way. "You've lost 10kg" would be the best thing I could possibly hear. More than that would be a serious feat. The second and the end of my summer weight loss challenge is 29 days away. I have 29 days to lose the last 10lbs.

I Did It

Yesterday I passed my driving theory test!

Somehow I did it.

I was convinced I'd failed.

I was stumped on a couple of questions which were not covered at all in the learning disc I'd been practicing on. I was also dubious of how well I would do in the hazard perception test. You have to watch a series of clips and alert the dangers you could face as a road user. But I DID IT. So I am rather pleased with myself.

I had a lesson on Monday and I must say I did enjoy it. I enjoyed it a lot. I drove into a neighbouring town, got to go round many roundabouts and got a fair amount of praise for my control and lane prioritising on the roundabouts. My steering appears to be up to scratch though I need to have a little time on my next lesson concerning braking. I tend to brake a little too hard at times and not hard enough at others as I try not to be so heavy footed. I am beginning to understand where hubby said I would find driving rather frustrating at times.

I think I have now done something like 6 hours and I am now looking forward to the next lesson next week. Something I've never said before.

So, yes, it's all slowly coming together and whilst I still have a long way to go, I am feeling confident now I have the first half of the test done that I can concentrate on learning the rest and I hope I can book  a practical test before or just after christmas/new year. We'll see how the lessons go.

In other news, I lost 2lbs this week.

James is wearing pants. Potty training appeared to happen overnight and he is now confident to wear pants most of the day (unless we go out) and is getting the hang of pulling them up and down well.

Matthew is missing his last week of school due to a contagious rash. Hand, foot and mouth disease has left him with blistery palms and ulcer like painful growths on his tongue. School holidays have started a week early over here but as long as my little man isn't poorly with it then thats fine. He seems ok in himself, just finds it a little awkward to eat.

Today we got Matthews school assessment. He is in the upper levels for science, maths and listening and understanding (2B  2 as in Yr2 and B as in closer to level 3 than level 2). He is a year plus ahead on reading (3C) and although his writing is still below par he is back into Year 2 levels of it rather than being a year behind. His teacher has got him back into his right yeargroup as he was graded 2A. So I am more than pleased with his progress. Well Done Matthew.

Family News July 2011

It appears we are all making progress in our own ways.

I am over the self criticism and feel less of a frump and failure in all I do. This is partially down to my weightloss, finding my exercise mojo and taking out my frustrations by bringing in exercise once again. Exercise is a great stress reliever and can help dissolve feelings of inadequecy as I've been feeling of late.

Last night I had one of those horrid nights I couldn't for the life of me get to sleep. We'd been out with the kids until 9.30pm and though I quickly fell asleep around 10.30, Liam awoke crying as he had kicked off all his bed covers. I covered him over and my brain went into overdrive. I just tried to go back to sleep but just about everything went through my head.

One thing in specific on my mind was my next driving lesson. It started as a sort of "how bad will I be this week" feel but with the confidence beginning to grow in me, I managed to turn my fears around and I am now looking forward to Saturdays lesson and what I can get out of it. I know I just need to be a little braver but I want to do it right. No-one puts more pressure on me than I do myself. I aim high and I expect to do things right first time. When I don't I just get angry with myself.

By the time James woke crying - saying he needed a clean nappy - I returned to bed to find it almost 4am. Then I was up with Liam at 7. So not the best nights sleep for me. Probably as I slept 11 hours the previous night. I also have a little cold beginning. Pah!

Hubby is thinking of trying for a new position at work. New jobs are being made available and he's considering trying it to help him progress up the career ladder quicker. It's better money, maybe longer hours but the overtime could be very good financially too. It's his choice and I support whatever he chooses to do.

I think it's also been around 4-5 months now since he quit smoking. I am very proud.

Matthew has only 6 more schooldays left as  a year 2 student. Another year is gone!!!

James is winning the potty battle. Today we've had two successful uses of the potty (including a number 2!) and it's lovely to see his confidence building with each time he tries and manages to go. It's almost like he wants to skip the potty stage. We have a step for him to stand on at the downstairs toilet and he loves to stand on there and pretend to wee like daddy. We have had some funny scenes where James has wanted to use the toilet but his body hasn't been ready and he will just stand there for up to ten minutes. He wants to do it and in time he will. It's just our job to encourage him and praise him when he does get it right.

Liam is saying more and more little words and we are letting him walk around much more. He likes holding my hand when we walk round shops and outside areas. He's getting to be a real little independent walker. He's fine around the house but feel that he needs a little more freedom when we are out.

My little boys are growing up!

Workouts

I've been working like a donkey this weekend.

I have decided that it's time to try and tone up again.

The thighs and my bottom are top of the list. So my exercise bike has been in grand demand.

Friday: 20 km 35minutes = 300cal

Saturday: 30 km 54minutes = 450cal

Sunday: 30 km as before

Monday: 30 km as before.

That's a lot of thigh work!

Throw in around 5 hours walking time and that's my lower body working overtime.

I am in a pair of jeans that is a couple of inches too big around the waist. My hips stop them falling down but my bottom doesn't fill the space at the back either. The next size down is too tight around the legs and thighs but fit the waist. If only I had a normal shaped body! 

So that is why I need to tone up again.

Saturday is my weighing day since it's when I last weighed and updated the ticker. I am going to try NOT to weigh myself again until Saturday. That's a challenge in itself.

Halfway to Target on My Summer Weight Loss Challenge

For anyone who may be interested, I have added a ticker at the bottom of the page.

I am 16lbs down from May. I'm doing ok and midway through my personal summer goal I set myself.

I am remaining confident that by the time I go on holiday in 4 weeks I can be 6lbs down and by the time August ends I would like to be that full 14lbs down.

I will then review for my next goal.

Why?

I know 3 other people who are learning to drive right now. 2 are ahead of me, one had her first driving lesson this week. They are all loving it.

So why am I the one who isn't?

It's not that I am finding it particularly daunting or hard, I just am not feeling it.

I want to learn, I want to do it - I really do.

I just wish I could skip this lesson crap!

I know I am a bit of a nervous driver, I underestimate my abilities and my confidence could be better but I am far from enjoying the experience.

My driving teacher is good, it's not his fault.

I'm just feeling more aware of my insecurities and failings this month and appear to be going through a whole period of crapness.

At least I've lost another 2lb this week and I've dragged the exercise bike out of it's dusty little corner.