Just to close the year I thought I would write a quick post.
2013 has been an ok year. We haven't had too bad a ride of it.
Health overall has been good for us all. We've not lost anyone close to us nor have we had any family births.
We've had a couple of family scares from the attempted suicide of my cousin and hubbys grandads heart attack but all seems well on both fronts these days.
In all, 2013 can easily be described as consistent.
I've said this before and I'll say it again, whilst I am a person that enjoys and looks forward to change, there are sometimes in life when it's just nice for things to stay the same.
Very little seems to have changed in 2013 and that's not necessarily bad.
I am settled with this life and I love the way my family have developed and grown up in the past 12 months.
If I could have a wish for the forthcoming year, it would be that I would like next year to be pretty much like this year.
I wish health and love to all my friends and family throughout the year.
We've had up and down days, we've had the general bugs and little injuries here and there but that happens to everyone.
Nothing really big has happened this year and that can be seen as a blessing as much as anything even though I look upon this year as an easily forgettable year.
It also makes me a little apprehensive as to what the new year may bring as we've had it fairly easy for some time.
So to one and all I wish you a happy new year with much happiness. xx
Tuesday, 31 December 2013
Saturday, 21 December 2013
Christmas Recap So Far
1) I loved James's nativity. They all looked so small.
2) Matthews Church Service got rave reviews from most parents at the school saying how lovely it all was. I don't know if they were being polite or if they went to a different service to me. I went because of Matthew but to be honest, it was a long slow hour that I would have been happier being at home for. Matthew didn't enjoy it either.
3) Liams little service was the best of the three. The kids went into the school hall and did all their singing and dancing on the stage. They were so CUTE. Mrs Farmer his teacher gave every child the oppertunity to announce a song or recite some song words as she pointed the microphone towards their little faces. When it came to Liam, he wasn't having any of the pointed microphone business. He grabbed it with both hands and jumped up and down with excitement shouting "Snowman, Snowman". I have a future star in the making!
4) We've started the present exchanging with some family and my best friend. We buy for each others kids and that's it. We only started last year as we've only known each other a couple of years but I felt bad that she buys for 3 of mine and I only buy two of hers so I sneaked in a little box of chocolates for her. On Friday I collected my presents (I did it in a drop before collecting Liam from nursery - this is to keep the Father Christmas illusion very much alive. I'm sure I got suspicious seeing bags and packages handed between parents - then collected ours on the way back after drop off yesterday) Whilst collecting our presents, she told me off for adding that extra present. She then started laughing saying that she'd hidden something in there for me as well. Great minds think alike!
5) Hair and brows done. Feeling ready for Christmas now. Big night out tonight.
6) I've rearranged that appointment for James. (See the last Bitching post) It's now January 20th and the only issue is I need someone to pick Liam up from nursery but I'm sure I can get that covered. Part of the problem is that the school is trying TOO hard. It's been very public in the press that our county of Suffolk (County = tiny State) is falling behind in the education leagues by rather alot. We are in one of the lowest success stories of the country. So there are more pressures on the Educational System. More pressure on the head teachers and more pressure on the teachers. It's a headache for everyone. Whilst I do understand they are trying to help and reach targets, it's annoying that everything has to be just so and kids are treated as statistics on how well a county is doing. Kids are being treated as numbers and so are the parents.
7) Kids all had school Christmas dinner this week. Matthew was put out because he didn't get a sausage to go with his turkey whilst Liam got a double helping!
8) The weekend at Butlins was lovely. It's been many years since I was photographed with Father Christmas but hey....it's Christmas.
9) We are all ready for Christmas. I can't wait. The kids are all set for Christmas and getting all excited. Liam last night saw some presents that are to be dropped off at my mums today and the little magical look on his face had me all choked up as he said "Father Christmas takes those" He was in real awe and it all seemed so special. I am really relishing these days. They are going to be so grown up before I know it.
10) Speaking of which, three weeks today, Matthew will turn TEN. Where has that decade of my life gone?
I hope to get one more post in on Monday or Tuesday to wish everyone a happy Christmas and update on the Christmas grown ups night out. x
2) Matthews Church Service got rave reviews from most parents at the school saying how lovely it all was. I don't know if they were being polite or if they went to a different service to me. I went because of Matthew but to be honest, it was a long slow hour that I would have been happier being at home for. Matthew didn't enjoy it either.
3) Liams little service was the best of the three. The kids went into the school hall and did all their singing and dancing on the stage. They were so CUTE. Mrs Farmer his teacher gave every child the oppertunity to announce a song or recite some song words as she pointed the microphone towards their little faces. When it came to Liam, he wasn't having any of the pointed microphone business. He grabbed it with both hands and jumped up and down with excitement shouting "Snowman, Snowman". I have a future star in the making!
4) We've started the present exchanging with some family and my best friend. We buy for each others kids and that's it. We only started last year as we've only known each other a couple of years but I felt bad that she buys for 3 of mine and I only buy two of hers so I sneaked in a little box of chocolates for her. On Friday I collected my presents (I did it in a drop before collecting Liam from nursery - this is to keep the Father Christmas illusion very much alive. I'm sure I got suspicious seeing bags and packages handed between parents - then collected ours on the way back after drop off yesterday) Whilst collecting our presents, she told me off for adding that extra present. She then started laughing saying that she'd hidden something in there for me as well. Great minds think alike!
5) Hair and brows done. Feeling ready for Christmas now. Big night out tonight.
6) I've rearranged that appointment for James. (See the last Bitching post) It's now January 20th and the only issue is I need someone to pick Liam up from nursery but I'm sure I can get that covered. Part of the problem is that the school is trying TOO hard. It's been very public in the press that our county of Suffolk (County = tiny State) is falling behind in the education leagues by rather alot. We are in one of the lowest success stories of the country. So there are more pressures on the Educational System. More pressure on the head teachers and more pressure on the teachers. It's a headache for everyone. Whilst I do understand they are trying to help and reach targets, it's annoying that everything has to be just so and kids are treated as statistics on how well a county is doing. Kids are being treated as numbers and so are the parents.
7) Kids all had school Christmas dinner this week. Matthew was put out because he didn't get a sausage to go with his turkey whilst Liam got a double helping!
8) The weekend at Butlins was lovely. It's been many years since I was photographed with Father Christmas but hey....it's Christmas.
9) We are all ready for Christmas. I can't wait. The kids are all set for Christmas and getting all excited. Liam last night saw some presents that are to be dropped off at my mums today and the little magical look on his face had me all choked up as he said "Father Christmas takes those" He was in real awe and it all seemed so special. I am really relishing these days. They are going to be so grown up before I know it.
10) Speaking of which, three weeks today, Matthew will turn TEN. Where has that decade of my life gone?
I hope to get one more post in on Monday or Tuesday to wish everyone a happy Christmas and update on the Christmas grown ups night out. x
Thursday, 19 December 2013
One More Day Of School Thank God
This week I have had enough!
I'm so glad it's the last day tomorrow then the holidays because if I don't get a break from that school soon, I swear I will have some form of meltdown and upset a lot of people.
I am so damn frustrated and annoyed.
I thought that teachers finish telling you what to do when you left school. I didn't think that they carried on doing it to adults and parents alike.
I am at the end of my patience and fit to burst.
I like the way that the school does treat kids as individuals, I just wish they could do the same for parents.
To stop treating every parent like they are an only child family. To take into account you have other kids that you are responsible and that sometimes they need attention too.
James has been given an appointment at the Child Development Centre that we've waited 3 months for. We were given very strict instructions that no other children were allowed, that they had no childcare facilities and it HAD to be a parent and James alone. So, we get the appointment for 9am January 3rd!! Slap bang in the middle of the school holidays when everyone I know who could possibly look after the big 2 are back at work. Hubby has no holiday left. My family all live half an hour away, work and would have to be at mine for 8am for me to get there in time.
Being honest and telling the school I have to reschedule it, I'm the big bad guy for not attending that appointment as they are so hard to come by!
I'm sorry, but instead of having a go at me for it being the most inconvenient time EVER maybe the people at these centres should look into family graphics before making pathetic appointments.
This is the last in a long list of "you should do this, you should do that" from the school regarding each child. All of which I've done. It just never feels enough.
The school just seems to make me feel and more of a failure despite doing everything I am advised. It's getting beyond a joke.
I've even given up being a volunteer as I just feel so bloody useless! What hope have other kids got with me helping them if I can't help my own.
I am just feeling dragged down and the teachers are so bloody patronising repeatedly telling me this appointment will help him etc and ya know, I SO want to help, I want this to be over, I want to get this done, I don't want the same shit different day crap for the next year or two, I just want to get it all done. The waiting is frustrating but so are the impossible to keep appointments as no-one has the brain cells to realise that it's probably not a good idea to give people appointments when there's other kids off school. They are obviously back after new year so why do they feel that no-one else may be?
I could just scream sometimes.
Of course, I know the teachers are just trying to help but at times like this, they really aren't helping at all.
I'm so glad it's the last day tomorrow then the holidays because if I don't get a break from that school soon, I swear I will have some form of meltdown and upset a lot of people.
I am so damn frustrated and annoyed.
I thought that teachers finish telling you what to do when you left school. I didn't think that they carried on doing it to adults and parents alike.
I am at the end of my patience and fit to burst.
I like the way that the school does treat kids as individuals, I just wish they could do the same for parents.
To stop treating every parent like they are an only child family. To take into account you have other kids that you are responsible and that sometimes they need attention too.
James has been given an appointment at the Child Development Centre that we've waited 3 months for. We were given very strict instructions that no other children were allowed, that they had no childcare facilities and it HAD to be a parent and James alone. So, we get the appointment for 9am January 3rd!! Slap bang in the middle of the school holidays when everyone I know who could possibly look after the big 2 are back at work. Hubby has no holiday left. My family all live half an hour away, work and would have to be at mine for 8am for me to get there in time.
Being honest and telling the school I have to reschedule it, I'm the big bad guy for not attending that appointment as they are so hard to come by!
I'm sorry, but instead of having a go at me for it being the most inconvenient time EVER maybe the people at these centres should look into family graphics before making pathetic appointments.
This is the last in a long list of "you should do this, you should do that" from the school regarding each child. All of which I've done. It just never feels enough.
The school just seems to make me feel and more of a failure despite doing everything I am advised. It's getting beyond a joke.
I've even given up being a volunteer as I just feel so bloody useless! What hope have other kids got with me helping them if I can't help my own.
I am just feeling dragged down and the teachers are so bloody patronising repeatedly telling me this appointment will help him etc and ya know, I SO want to help, I want this to be over, I want to get this done, I don't want the same shit different day crap for the next year or two, I just want to get it all done. The waiting is frustrating but so are the impossible to keep appointments as no-one has the brain cells to realise that it's probably not a good idea to give people appointments when there's other kids off school. They are obviously back after new year so why do they feel that no-one else may be?
I could just scream sometimes.
Of course, I know the teachers are just trying to help but at times like this, they really aren't helping at all.
Tuesday, 10 December 2013
Operation Christmas.
Nearly a month has past since my last post. It's just all so chaotic these days. I knew life with 3 kids would be busy but never this CRAZY!
I've managed to get all our Christmas shopping done. We still have great grandparents wanting us to get gifts the for the kids and tell them how much they owe us. We might actually give them the cash after Christmas so they can buy something they want themselves as we're running out of ideas.
So, forgetting last week here's the diary:
Mon 9th December: James nativity play. His first one. He was the cutest little sheep ever!
Tues 10th December: Must dye my hair. Looks and feels a mess. Need it ready for next weekend!
Wed 11th December: My mum and nan are visiting and having lunch with myself and Liam before going off to see the nativity themselves.
Fri 13th December: We are going to take the kids to Butlins for Christmas again. We were very undecided on whether to go or not this year but decided since we've realistically only got up to 3 or 4 years of Santa being magical - We have to do these things whilst the kids are still little.
Sun 15th December: Return home
Mon 16th December: Matthew has no school play this year so is up at the Village Church to do a Christmas service. Not really sure how it will turn out but I hear there is a Christmas Rap and Matthew and some of his friends are beatboxing!?! Whatever happened to traditional carols?
Tues 17th December: Getting a beauty treatment. Oooooh!! Getting my brows done professionally. Tint, wax and shaped. Never had it done so excited. This is swiftly followed by Liams little nursery Christmas sing song service.
Wed 18th December: Last day to meet up with bestie. We're off for a cuppa something nice somewhere nice and maybe lunch out to celebrate the end of the year. It's also School Christmas Dinner day so Liam is staying for lunch club!
Thurs 19th December: Christmas parties day at school! I've volunteered to help out with the nursery.
Fri 20th December: Last day of school. Liam in lunch club second time this week. My haircut at 1pm.
Sat 21st December: Collapse and fall asleep until Christmas eve! Nope, Christmas party!!! Woop woop.
Can't wait. I have my dress, boots and all beauty things will be complete. Sorta the Cinderella of the Village this year. Visit the local farmers market in the morning for Christmas local Vegetables.
Sun 22nd December: Rest away any hangover feelings.
Mon 23rd December: I think this is actually a free day BUT will most likely be the day we do the Christmas food shop after leaving the kids with a responsible adult family member to reduce the stress. Defrost turkey.
Tues 24th December: Christmas eve. Make Santa fresh mince pies, make sure reindeer have carrots. Sort out tv planner over festive days. Hope I remembered to take turkey out on Monday. Hopefully all presents will be in the right homes. No idea when or how we are gonna distribute presents this year.
Weds 25th December: Christmas Day.
Thurs 26th December: Family over for boxing day tea, play games in the evening.
Sat 28th December: Christmas dinner at my father in law's. We've never been invited before so this will be a new experience. I've heard he's a very good cook!
Tues 31st December: New Years Party with the local Indian Restaurant gang. Hope I can still fit in my dress!
Wed 1st January: It'll be frigging January in no time!!!
Happy Christmas and Happy New Year just in case I don't get to post again in a hurry, xxxx
I've managed to get all our Christmas shopping done. We still have great grandparents wanting us to get gifts the for the kids and tell them how much they owe us. We might actually give them the cash after Christmas so they can buy something they want themselves as we're running out of ideas.
So, forgetting last week here's the diary:
Mon 9th December: James nativity play. His first one. He was the cutest little sheep ever!
Tues 10th December: Must dye my hair. Looks and feels a mess. Need it ready for next weekend!
Wed 11th December: My mum and nan are visiting and having lunch with myself and Liam before going off to see the nativity themselves.
Fri 13th December: We are going to take the kids to Butlins for Christmas again. We were very undecided on whether to go or not this year but decided since we've realistically only got up to 3 or 4 years of Santa being magical - We have to do these things whilst the kids are still little.
Sun 15th December: Return home
Mon 16th December: Matthew has no school play this year so is up at the Village Church to do a Christmas service. Not really sure how it will turn out but I hear there is a Christmas Rap and Matthew and some of his friends are beatboxing!?! Whatever happened to traditional carols?
Tues 17th December: Getting a beauty treatment. Oooooh!! Getting my brows done professionally. Tint, wax and shaped. Never had it done so excited. This is swiftly followed by Liams little nursery Christmas sing song service.
Wed 18th December: Last day to meet up with bestie. We're off for a cuppa something nice somewhere nice and maybe lunch out to celebrate the end of the year. It's also School Christmas Dinner day so Liam is staying for lunch club!
Thurs 19th December: Christmas parties day at school! I've volunteered to help out with the nursery.
Fri 20th December: Last day of school. Liam in lunch club second time this week. My haircut at 1pm.
Sat 21st December: Collapse and fall asleep until Christmas eve! Nope, Christmas party!!! Woop woop.
Can't wait. I have my dress, boots and all beauty things will be complete. Sorta the Cinderella of the Village this year. Visit the local farmers market in the morning for Christmas local Vegetables.
Sun 22nd December: Rest away any hangover feelings.
Mon 23rd December: I think this is actually a free day BUT will most likely be the day we do the Christmas food shop after leaving the kids with a responsible adult family member to reduce the stress. Defrost turkey.
Tues 24th December: Christmas eve. Make Santa fresh mince pies, make sure reindeer have carrots. Sort out tv planner over festive days. Hope I remembered to take turkey out on Monday. Hopefully all presents will be in the right homes. No idea when or how we are gonna distribute presents this year.
Weds 25th December: Christmas Day.
Thurs 26th December: Family over for boxing day tea, play games in the evening.
Sat 28th December: Christmas dinner at my father in law's. We've never been invited before so this will be a new experience. I've heard he's a very good cook!
Tues 31st December: New Years Party with the local Indian Restaurant gang. Hope I can still fit in my dress!
Wed 1st January: It'll be frigging January in no time!!!
Happy Christmas and Happy New Year just in case I don't get to post again in a hurry, xxxx
Friday, 15 November 2013
I Bought A Party Dress.
I like my colours, I LOVE patterns but I seem to live in jeans and a top. Sometimes, I wear joggies and a top but my style is pretty much tomboy with a touch of pink and flowers.
However, as party season is drawing near, I felt a change from the same old same old.
I have bought myself a dress for Christmas. It is completely different to anything I own and the weight loss is bringing out a new form of confidence so I have actually bought my first ever SHORT dress.
I tried it on in a shop yesterday and it chose me rather than I chose it. On the hanger I wasn't too convinced but it fit perfectly and looked beautiful on. It felt a good quality. It fitted to my good bits giving me good shape and flared out over my hips and bottom just where I needed it to.
Due to me not being of model height, the dress ends at my knee and I will be having knee high boots with it as I venture out to a Christmas meal and disco and the same for new year. I also treated myself to a heart necklace and black rose corsage to finish off the look.
Apart from my wedding dress, hubby has never really seen me done up all glam and ready to party in style. Yes, I do want to impress him and want him proud of me.
I will be posting photo's of said nights out so watch this space.
However, as party season is drawing near, I felt a change from the same old same old.
I have bought myself a dress for Christmas. It is completely different to anything I own and the weight loss is bringing out a new form of confidence so I have actually bought my first ever SHORT dress.
I tried it on in a shop yesterday and it chose me rather than I chose it. On the hanger I wasn't too convinced but it fit perfectly and looked beautiful on. It felt a good quality. It fitted to my good bits giving me good shape and flared out over my hips and bottom just where I needed it to.
Apart from my wedding dress, hubby has never really seen me done up all glam and ready to party in style. Yes, I do want to impress him and want him proud of me.
I will be posting photo's of said nights out so watch this space.
Sunday, 10 November 2013
Ouch
Todays headlines are as follows.
1) Hubby's grandad is out of hospital and doing well again. He has lots of pills so we are hoping he doesn't have another bad side effect like last time. He came out on Tuesday but went back on Wednesday due to his medication making his blood pressure too low.
2) Hubby had a little slip on the stairs yesterday. Bruised bum, scraped thigh. Nothing too serious.
3) Hubby's step-mum had a fall on Thursday, She's not old but had a trip whilst shopping, put her arm out to balance herself and ended up with a broken shoulder.
4) I crashed the car. Yep, me, big bad me. Accidentally touched the accelerator rather than the brake and hit a stationary car in a supermarket car park. Minimal damage to my car but a bump and 2 nice lines down the back passenger seat of other car. No-one was about for the car and after 20 minutes I left the car park as I had to collect Liam for school. Fear not dearest readers, I do actually have a conscience and have sent my details off to the supermarket in case anyone wants to claim on insurance. I also phoned the police as I know it's a crime to "hit and run" though I personally don't think waiting 20 minutes for someone to come out is exactly running away from the scene of a crime. Anyway, I don't the rules of car parks and prosecution nor do I know if there were security cameras or witnesses so I've covered my arse so to speak. If I get fined and points on my license I deserve it. I was entirely at fault and fucked up. End of. I was so cool and collected it was unbelievable. Even owning up to the police was fine. I work TOO well under pressure, maybe I should become a spy...... Anyway, that was Friday. I couldn't hide the damage so I told hubby someone else hit me and didn't stop. I was generally feeling very down and upset with myself. We had to fix part of the bumper back on and there was a little paint damage but on the whole all was fine. I eventually told him the truth this morning. He was cool with it. Told me that car parks often work on different laws as private land and that I could have probably gone immediately and not owned up without any repercussions. However, I am an honest person and I know how I would have felt if that was my vehicle so I owned up. I didn't sleep hardly at all that night through feelings of guilt and paranoia of police turning up etc. My conscience is too huge.
5) Liams school application is in. I submitted it all online and got an email back instantly to say my admissions application had been received.
6) I have now lost 33lbs with Weight Watchers this year. I want to lose 9 more by Christmas and new year so I can say I've lost 3 stone this year.
7) My kids (the little ones) have learnt how to play movies through the tv.
8) It's only 6 more weeks until the schools finish for Christmas. That's CRAZY! Where has 2013 gone? Not that I'm particularly gonna miss it. It's been a bit of a forgettable year.
9) Hubby and I are going out for dinner by ourselves tonight. I think I deserve that large glass of wine that I have my mind set on. No idea what to eat, but boy, do I need wine.
10) Happy Week ahead to one and all.
1) Hubby's grandad is out of hospital and doing well again. He has lots of pills so we are hoping he doesn't have another bad side effect like last time. He came out on Tuesday but went back on Wednesday due to his medication making his blood pressure too low.
2) Hubby had a little slip on the stairs yesterday. Bruised bum, scraped thigh. Nothing too serious.
3) Hubby's step-mum had a fall on Thursday, She's not old but had a trip whilst shopping, put her arm out to balance herself and ended up with a broken shoulder.
4) I crashed the car. Yep, me, big bad me. Accidentally touched the accelerator rather than the brake and hit a stationary car in a supermarket car park. Minimal damage to my car but a bump and 2 nice lines down the back passenger seat of other car. No-one was about for the car and after 20 minutes I left the car park as I had to collect Liam for school. Fear not dearest readers, I do actually have a conscience and have sent my details off to the supermarket in case anyone wants to claim on insurance. I also phoned the police as I know it's a crime to "hit and run" though I personally don't think waiting 20 minutes for someone to come out is exactly running away from the scene of a crime. Anyway, I don't the rules of car parks and prosecution nor do I know if there were security cameras or witnesses so I've covered my arse so to speak. If I get fined and points on my license I deserve it. I was entirely at fault and fucked up. End of. I was so cool and collected it was unbelievable. Even owning up to the police was fine. I work TOO well under pressure, maybe I should become a spy...... Anyway, that was Friday. I couldn't hide the damage so I told hubby someone else hit me and didn't stop. I was generally feeling very down and upset with myself. We had to fix part of the bumper back on and there was a little paint damage but on the whole all was fine. I eventually told him the truth this morning. He was cool with it. Told me that car parks often work on different laws as private land and that I could have probably gone immediately and not owned up without any repercussions. However, I am an honest person and I know how I would have felt if that was my vehicle so I owned up. I didn't sleep hardly at all that night through feelings of guilt and paranoia of police turning up etc. My conscience is too huge.
5) Liams school application is in. I submitted it all online and got an email back instantly to say my admissions application had been received.
6) I have now lost 33lbs with Weight Watchers this year. I want to lose 9 more by Christmas and new year so I can say I've lost 3 stone this year.
7) My kids (the little ones) have learnt how to play movies through the tv.
8) It's only 6 more weeks until the schools finish for Christmas. That's CRAZY! Where has 2013 gone? Not that I'm particularly gonna miss it. It's been a bit of a forgettable year.
9) Hubby and I are going out for dinner by ourselves tonight. I think I deserve that large glass of wine that I have my mind set on. No idea what to eat, but boy, do I need wine.
10) Happy Week ahead to one and all.
Wednesday, 6 November 2013
Five
Time goes so fast when you have kids. You get through each week. Each weekend. Each half term, each term. Each major holiday. Each birthday. Each anniversary. Each festive celebration. As humans we always seem to be looking ahead to the next event and before you know it you have kids that are growing up at such a surprising rate.
Not just dealing with the fact that my middle baby has turned 5, today I received the official paperwork for Liam to attend full time school in September next year. Oh. My. God. This really is getting real that within a year I will be semi redundant. I will only be doing the school run TWICE a day for the next 5 years and then I will have three secondary school children.
Speaking of the youngest little man, he was sent home from school today after bumping his head at nursery this morning. It resulted in a little cut on his scalp and a bit of a bump but he seems happy enough in himself. He came home, promptly ate two jam doughnuts, helped himself to some biscuits asked for squash and perched himself in front of the tv. After a couple of hours he had a nap but woke up to find that I had switched channels as he slept and kicked up a fuss over it. This HUGELY suggests that Liam is in fact completely normal despite the bump to the head.
Hubbys grandad was released from hospital yesterday. However, a phonecall from his nan in the last hour has said he's not doing well at home and is going to be admitted back in. She was waiting for the ambulance but didn't tell me much more than that. So now we just wait again to see what happens and what the problem is this time. For now we just have to hope for the best for him.
Saturday, 2 November 2013
This Unlucky 13 Year Is Beginning To Grate
They say "Thirteen" is an unlucky number and the past few weeks really have been a mixture of highs and lows though it tends to be the lows that have the most impact.
This week the kids have been off school. I've learned of a new pregnancy and a loss. We've celebrated birthdays, we've also had worrying news.
There appears to be something for our T family about the early hours of November 1st.
Early November 1st 2008, James was born into the world.
Early November 1st 2011, Nelson his little cousin arrived.
Early November 1st 2013, Hubby's Grandad was rushed into hospital suffering from a heart attack.
He's doing ok. Family are all a little shocked but he's being kept in for observation over the weekend.
He's around 90, he does well for his age but he's feeling the strain a bit.
The years always seem to follow a them, this year, certainly the latter part of the year seems to revolve around the delicate subject of mortality. From my cousins suicide attempt, to my friends ruptured ectopic and now grandads health, it's all incredibly real that none of us are infallible, invincible and none of us know what the future holds.
I don't often look forward to new year but this year has been emotionally and mentally tiring!
Speaking of which, I am doing something VERY different this new year. I am actually going out for new year!
This will be the first time in at least eleven years that I have had the opportunity to do so. Ten new years eve's ago I was days away from giving birth to my oldest son so it was the year before that or possibly the year before that when I last celebrated the change of the year.
This year hubby and I will be going to the village hall which has been taken over by our friends at the Indian Takeaway who are putting on a Bollywood night. Complete with food and entertainment, this will be a very different night and I am incredibly looking forward to it. I might even, get this... wear..... a.... dress..... I have my eye on a couple of dresses I like but I want to try them on. I LOVE one dress but it looks a little short. My legs aren't designed for the above the knee cut dresses but I'll give it a go if I can try on and it looks good. There's the Christmas meal a couple of weeks before so the dress will get two outings over the festivities, so I just need to choose wisely then I have the dilemma of shoes! I want stylish, ideally heels but I want to be able to dance (and walk) in them. Now that IS a challenge!
So that's it, trying to look forward to things as current times have been a little up and down but James had a lovely birthday despite the fact we were worried about Grandad, getting lots of Disney Infinity Figures, having fish and chips, chicken nuggets, and cake for his birthday dinner.
This week the kids have been off school. I've learned of a new pregnancy and a loss. We've celebrated birthdays, we've also had worrying news.
There appears to be something for our T family about the early hours of November 1st.
Early November 1st 2008, James was born into the world.
Early November 1st 2011, Nelson his little cousin arrived.
Early November 1st 2013, Hubby's Grandad was rushed into hospital suffering from a heart attack.
He's doing ok. Family are all a little shocked but he's being kept in for observation over the weekend.
He's around 90, he does well for his age but he's feeling the strain a bit.
The years always seem to follow a them, this year, certainly the latter part of the year seems to revolve around the delicate subject of mortality. From my cousins suicide attempt, to my friends ruptured ectopic and now grandads health, it's all incredibly real that none of us are infallible, invincible and none of us know what the future holds.
I don't often look forward to new year but this year has been emotionally and mentally tiring!
Speaking of which, I am doing something VERY different this new year. I am actually going out for new year!
This will be the first time in at least eleven years that I have had the opportunity to do so. Ten new years eve's ago I was days away from giving birth to my oldest son so it was the year before that or possibly the year before that when I last celebrated the change of the year.
This year hubby and I will be going to the village hall which has been taken over by our friends at the Indian Takeaway who are putting on a Bollywood night. Complete with food and entertainment, this will be a very different night and I am incredibly looking forward to it. I might even, get this... wear..... a.... dress..... I have my eye on a couple of dresses I like but I want to try them on. I LOVE one dress but it looks a little short. My legs aren't designed for the above the knee cut dresses but I'll give it a go if I can try on and it looks good. There's the Christmas meal a couple of weeks before so the dress will get two outings over the festivities, so I just need to choose wisely then I have the dilemma of shoes! I want stylish, ideally heels but I want to be able to dance (and walk) in them. Now that IS a challenge!
So that's it, trying to look forward to things as current times have been a little up and down but James had a lovely birthday despite the fact we were worried about Grandad, getting lots of Disney Infinity Figures, having fish and chips, chicken nuggets, and cake for his birthday dinner.
Thursday, 31 October 2013
VERY Very Quickly
A few days back I wrote about my friend who suffered a life threatening ectopic. Things were really touch and go at the start of the month and everyone was just really relieved she lived to tell the tale.
The whole scenario really left me upset and I am now over it but still an emotional little being.
Today however, I heard the BEST news ever.
Today, she tells me she is 11 weeks pregnant!
Talk about shellshocked!
I am completely overwhelmed for them and so so excited for the little family.
It turns out, she was expecting non identical twins. One baby made it to the womb, the other didn't.
I'm so so overjoyed right now I cannot put into words.
Congratulations to Family R.
The whole scenario really left me upset and I am now over it but still an emotional little being.
Today however, I heard the BEST news ever.
Today, she tells me she is 11 weeks pregnant!
Talk about shellshocked!
I am completely overwhelmed for them and so so excited for the little family.
It turns out, she was expecting non identical twins. One baby made it to the womb, the other didn't.
I'm so so overjoyed right now I cannot put into words.
Congratulations to Family R.
Sunday, 27 October 2013
Hmmmmm
So, where to begin. October has not been the best of months. I don't believe in dwelling on the bad things in life so I tend to leave them behind rather than have crazy emotionally messed up posts all over the place.
This has been a hugely emotional month.
Mostly relating to babies.
This month has already seen 3 births with another overdue friend set for induction tomorrow. I've heard of two new pregnancies this month and I do get full of excitement and emotion for these people.
Nothing could have prepared me for the shocking event that happened 3 weeks ago though.
Another friend, a mother to 2 little boys and a little girl aged between 5 and 18months found out she was expecting her fourth baby in spectacular fashion. Collapsing in the bathroom covered in sweat with abdominal pains. It turned out to be a ruptured ectopic. She hadn't even suspected she was pregnant. Emergency surgery. Lost 7 out of 8 pints of blood and was told she was about 10 minutes from death if the ambulance hadn't reached her as quick as it did. I spent a good week VERY upset about this. She is a good friend, her oldest is just a couple of months older than James, her daughter is in Liams nursery and with a baby, the thought of them all losing their mum has been heartbreaking and has really made me take stock of the world a little.
Hubby received another promotion. Days later, half of his previous workforce were sacked due to misconduct and neglectful work. Hubby knew this a few days beforehand as he now counts as middle management and it upset him alot too knowing that families were going to be having difficulties. Although it's only down to their personal performance at work and not being able to do a dangerous and important job properly, it still comes as a blow to those relying on that work for money.
Both of these just really make you think that you don't appreciate what you have in life sometimes.
Job security and Health are things we all too often take for granted. We get on with our day to day lives and every day someone is having some form of life trauma and we don't always see it.
October was certainly a month of tears for me as I turned all that stress and worry to a new world of appreciation. It made me think that "This is how it must feel if I was ever pregnant with a girl!"
Already feeling broody with the babies being born and my friends miscarriage it made me think that although I am not planning on any more babies myself, I've become very aware that my biological clock is ticking. I don't want any more children but there's something about the thought of not having any more that I find upsetting. I LOVED being pregnant and I loved having babies, they just don't stay that way forever. I am back to being happy with the 3 boys and stopping all those "If we just had one more....." thoughts that were running through my overactive female over-ruling ovary brain for the first half of the month. My friend was 40 in August, by no means old for a 4th pregnancy but it goes to show that things do get riskier as we get older and this baby she didn't know about could have cost her her life. Thankfully, she is now back to her normal old self and coping well.
This week we had all the parents evenings. The boys are all doing well on the whole. I didn't learn anything new. Liam is happy in nursery, working hard, playing hard, making friends and enjoying his little world. His speech needs work. His teacher offered to get us both into a makaton sign language course so I can help him communicate more and if I am planning to help out in the school it will help with other kids too. Sounds a winner to me. James is settling into full time school well, He is growing in confidence. Has a good level of understanding and enjoys his day. He is making more friends and is always happy. Matthew is working hard but needs to work on his focus and handwriting. We were also given all the leaflets and talks for the next stage of education. As he is now in year 5, we are thinking ahead to year 7 when he will go up to secondary school. (SECONDARY SCHOOL - BIG SCHOOL - FOR TEENAGERS - WITH COLLEGE AND EVERYTHING AGGGGHHHHH!!!!! WHAT HAPPENED TO MY FIRST BABY?!) Realistically by the end of the year he should have a good idea on what school he wants to go to, there is a choice of 3 local schools and I think we are agreed on which one will be best for him (It's the nearest one). All schools require school busses and a new level of maturity and independence. It's scary!
One of his teachers seems to think he is depressed again due to a bad day he had at school this week. His anger issues are a worry but he seems fine at home. He is calmer and quieter than he used to be and there are still the odd days he is a little monkey but I DO think it's just him changing as he grows up. I see a happy fun loving boy who does get himself into trouble due to his temper occassionally (He's a boy!) and as he grows up he's discovering that he is more powerful and he will argue his case, his attitude sucks at times but I swear Matthew has got the "teenage bug" a few years early. The boy is 9 going on 16! So for now, I don't see a second "bad day" of anger and feeling down since July is enough to get him sent to the GP with the schools worry of clinical depression. I will be keeping an eye on it but Matthew is a changeable boy by the day and like I said we are at that "Tween-ager" stage. He's not a little boy anymore, yet he's not a teenager or adult enough just yet. So I EXPECT him to change and discover new emotions, mental and bodily changes. He's getting to that age range where this sort of behaviour is rather normal so I have no real concerns where I think it is a long running issue.Yes, there are issues of depression in the family so I will keep an eye on it all but I do think Matthew knows how to play a situation to his advantage quite often.
Well, I think that's pretty much everything that I haven't reported up until now because everything was just getting to me. I've also had a bad cold and headaches (possibly stress related) for most of the month but I look forward to the new month.
This week is half term so I at least get a bit of a rest and tomorrow we are expected a big muther of a storm complete with Hurricanes, flooding, structural damage, fallen trees etc, You name it. We'll soon see if it lives up to the hype. My nan is terrified but I am rather excited by it. I will certainly be staying indoors and wishing friends and family, especially hubby, well on their journeys and days at work.
This has been a hugely emotional month.
Mostly relating to babies.
This month has already seen 3 births with another overdue friend set for induction tomorrow. I've heard of two new pregnancies this month and I do get full of excitement and emotion for these people.
Nothing could have prepared me for the shocking event that happened 3 weeks ago though.
Another friend, a mother to 2 little boys and a little girl aged between 5 and 18months found out she was expecting her fourth baby in spectacular fashion. Collapsing in the bathroom covered in sweat with abdominal pains. It turned out to be a ruptured ectopic. She hadn't even suspected she was pregnant. Emergency surgery. Lost 7 out of 8 pints of blood and was told she was about 10 minutes from death if the ambulance hadn't reached her as quick as it did. I spent a good week VERY upset about this. She is a good friend, her oldest is just a couple of months older than James, her daughter is in Liams nursery and with a baby, the thought of them all losing their mum has been heartbreaking and has really made me take stock of the world a little.
Hubby received another promotion. Days later, half of his previous workforce were sacked due to misconduct and neglectful work. Hubby knew this a few days beforehand as he now counts as middle management and it upset him alot too knowing that families were going to be having difficulties. Although it's only down to their personal performance at work and not being able to do a dangerous and important job properly, it still comes as a blow to those relying on that work for money.
Both of these just really make you think that you don't appreciate what you have in life sometimes.
Job security and Health are things we all too often take for granted. We get on with our day to day lives and every day someone is having some form of life trauma and we don't always see it.
October was certainly a month of tears for me as I turned all that stress and worry to a new world of appreciation. It made me think that "This is how it must feel if I was ever pregnant with a girl!"
Already feeling broody with the babies being born and my friends miscarriage it made me think that although I am not planning on any more babies myself, I've become very aware that my biological clock is ticking. I don't want any more children but there's something about the thought of not having any more that I find upsetting. I LOVED being pregnant and I loved having babies, they just don't stay that way forever. I am back to being happy with the 3 boys and stopping all those "If we just had one more....." thoughts that were running through my overactive female over-ruling ovary brain for the first half of the month. My friend was 40 in August, by no means old for a 4th pregnancy but it goes to show that things do get riskier as we get older and this baby she didn't know about could have cost her her life. Thankfully, she is now back to her normal old self and coping well.
This week we had all the parents evenings. The boys are all doing well on the whole. I didn't learn anything new. Liam is happy in nursery, working hard, playing hard, making friends and enjoying his little world. His speech needs work. His teacher offered to get us both into a makaton sign language course so I can help him communicate more and if I am planning to help out in the school it will help with other kids too. Sounds a winner to me. James is settling into full time school well, He is growing in confidence. Has a good level of understanding and enjoys his day. He is making more friends and is always happy. Matthew is working hard but needs to work on his focus and handwriting. We were also given all the leaflets and talks for the next stage of education. As he is now in year 5, we are thinking ahead to year 7 when he will go up to secondary school. (SECONDARY SCHOOL - BIG SCHOOL - FOR TEENAGERS - WITH COLLEGE AND EVERYTHING AGGGGHHHHH!!!!! WHAT HAPPENED TO MY FIRST BABY?!) Realistically by the end of the year he should have a good idea on what school he wants to go to, there is a choice of 3 local schools and I think we are agreed on which one will be best for him (It's the nearest one). All schools require school busses and a new level of maturity and independence. It's scary!
One of his teachers seems to think he is depressed again due to a bad day he had at school this week. His anger issues are a worry but he seems fine at home. He is calmer and quieter than he used to be and there are still the odd days he is a little monkey but I DO think it's just him changing as he grows up. I see a happy fun loving boy who does get himself into trouble due to his temper occassionally (He's a boy!) and as he grows up he's discovering that he is more powerful and he will argue his case, his attitude sucks at times but I swear Matthew has got the "teenage bug" a few years early. The boy is 9 going on 16! So for now, I don't see a second "bad day" of anger and feeling down since July is enough to get him sent to the GP with the schools worry of clinical depression. I will be keeping an eye on it but Matthew is a changeable boy by the day and like I said we are at that "Tween-ager" stage. He's not a little boy anymore, yet he's not a teenager or adult enough just yet. So I EXPECT him to change and discover new emotions, mental and bodily changes. He's getting to that age range where this sort of behaviour is rather normal so I have no real concerns where I think it is a long running issue.Yes, there are issues of depression in the family so I will keep an eye on it all but I do think Matthew knows how to play a situation to his advantage quite often.
Well, I think that's pretty much everything that I haven't reported up until now because everything was just getting to me. I've also had a bad cold and headaches (possibly stress related) for most of the month but I look forward to the new month.
This week is half term so I at least get a bit of a rest and tomorrow we are expected a big muther of a storm complete with Hurricanes, flooding, structural damage, fallen trees etc, You name it. We'll soon see if it lives up to the hype. My nan is terrified but I am rather excited by it. I will certainly be staying indoors and wishing friends and family, especially hubby, well on their journeys and days at work.
Monday, 14 October 2013
Real Life Parenting.
I have to confess. This post is stolen from Facebook but has a million truths in such a little space. It made me smile, it made me grimace and most of all, I nodded to most of it in agreement.
Mothers of the world unite and feel "normal!" :)
Mothers of the world unite and feel "normal!" :)
I hope that has brightened everyones Monday.
NOTICE TO ALL MUMS....YOUNG AND OLD!!!!!
Motherhood isn't just about exhaustion and all-encompassing love. There's a lot of secret shame thrown in the mix too. But understand, while you're worrying about just what kind of an harassed harridan you've turned into, all the other mamas are feeling the same...
TODDLER TOURETTE'S
You will suddenly notice you mutter 'please shut up' under your breath repeatedly like a crazy person. Add a swear word in the middle on occasion - probably when your child is screaming in traffic or has bellowed 'Nooooooooo' in your face for the 1,000th time.
THE DEATH STARE
You will develop the ability to melt ice with one raised eyebrow and an insincere smile. This will be aimed mostly at your husband, although your mother and mother in law are likely victims too. Who can expect to question a mother about what she's feeding her child when she hasn't slept for a week and not expect to get a filthy look?
SHOWOFF-ITIS
You will honestly believe your child is the most beautiful, intelligent, gifted, witty creature to ever grace the planet. So what if he won't share, eat vegetables or sleep through the night - he's just expressing himself. With a brilliant brain comes sacrifices.
YOU CRAVE A GLASS OF SAUVIGNON
You start to truly value booze. You dream about crisp, chilled glasses of white wine and are even tempted to hit up the out-of-date Bailey's left over from Christmas after the bedtime routine.
CRAZY, CRAZY NIGHTS
You'd never admit this to your fun friends, but going to a bar or club is a kind of scary thought. You'll either feel too old and cry into your drink, or be so pleased for the child-free release you'll be the embarrassing one, twerking in the DJ booth by midnight. Neither is a good look.
ASYMMETRICAL ASSETS
Despite declaring you don't care, you'll secretly hanker after a boob job. Pregnancy and nursing has left you with one significantly jauntier and bigger breast than the other and not even a highly-patterned pussy bow tie blouse can disguise it.
THE M DIET PLAN
While pretending to be interested in juicing, organic fruit and the benefits of a macrobiotic regime, your diet actually consists of cold fish fingers, humous straight from the tub and peanut butter by the spoon. Protein is a thing now, though right?
TRUCK THAT!
You can now distinguish between a digger, a crane and a tractor... And can perfectly mimic the sounds of all emergency vehicles. This is a talent - when you were young and wild - you never wished for on any level.
A BUM DEAL
You have piles in the bottom area. They remind you of those purple plastic bunches of grapes you see hanging from the ceiling in cheesy trattorias. You can no longer face microwaved lasagna or focaccia in such an establishment.
WEE MACHINE
You now pee your pants a little if you laugh too hard, drink too much or jump too high. Expect to leave a puddle if you ever raucously leap on to a trampoline at a summer fete after a glass of Pimm's.
GRATITUDE ATTITUDE
You are thankful for things in a new way. Not deep and meaningful stuff your childless friends are - like sunsets, inner peace and Elgar. You're happy to go to the loo on your own, finish a cup of tea while it's still warm and to be wearing a clean t shirt.
GUILT TRIP
Your baby will roll off the bed. You'll tell people and they'll say 'Oh no! But don't worry, it happens to everyone.' Then it happens again, so you stay silent and convince yourself that any behavioral problems they have in their teen years will stem from that second unguarded 10 seconds.
Sunday, 6 October 2013
Ticking Boxes
Every now and then you find something that means so much at such an important time.
Recently my favourite teacher friend posted this to facebook.
http://www.today.com/moms/why-i-dont-force-my-kids-say-please-or-walk-1C7398514
It struck a chord immensely.
The "please" and "thank you" thing is irrelevant for this post but the whole message remains the same. Kids develop and progress at different rates.
On Friday I had to take James to the local Child Development Center. He had been referred from our GP as our nursery teachers had concerns about his abilities. From speech to "not making sounds when playing with toys" and his agility, they had concerns.
I, on the other hand, didn't.
Admittedly, James is a quiet child and learned to speak later than alot of other kids but at 6am there is nothing wrong with his speech or confidence in speaking. Together he and Liam have a lot of imaginary play first thing in the morning. They play "Holidays". They talk about what they are packing, what toys they want to take, what they want to do for fun, what they want for dinner that night, when they should go to bed. They chatter like the birds in the trees as the sun rises.
James is naturally a thinker. He won't jump in head first, he won't shout out, he's very analytical and assesses situations. He has HUGE problem solving abilities and completes tasks with ease on the Wii U when playing games. He realises when he makes mistakes and discovers how to solve issues and get past that.
James' old nursery teacher came along with me. She offered moral support as her son has also had dealings with the CDC and as a mum, she wanted to help, also as a teacher that has helped James get this far, she wanted to follow through on his progress. I LOVE Mrs W. She's a lovely lovely woman and I look upon her as more of a friend than a teacher, I just realise that we have differing views on my son. She has done her best in her capacity as a teacher and I've followed advice each step of the way on how to progress with James.
I am incredibly honest with her and told her that if she ever thought I appeared to be dismissive or defensive regarding her and Mrs F (James' other nursery teacher) then I apologise for that since I don't see James struggle with some of the things she's said about in the past. There was concerns that he didn't play a "pairs" game. He's done that since he was two! He probably didn't feel like it that day. He has times we play snap but changes the rules - Instead of being 2 identical cards as such, they match because they have the same colour, they are baddies, they are superheroes. He puts things into categories very well and is always trying to be one step ahead! I also explained that my main concern is James. I am not going to be upset if he needs extra help anywhere because that's how it is sometimes. I know I've done my best at home and his teachers are doing the best for him at school. I'm pleased they are giving me the information so we can work together to make James' life easier. I had to wait until Year 2, when Matthew was 7 before anyone listened to me and saw my behavioural concerns with him.
I also explained that sometimes I do get emotional. Not because I feel like I am being criticised or my child being "labelled" but because I just want to do whats best for them and really want to assist where I can.
A child at home can be incredibly different to a child they see in school and this seems the case with James.
He went through the basic assessment, Height, weight, shape of spine, measurements of head, development of hands and feet etc. Everything was spot on as it should be. He does run with a wonky run and balances with his arms as he runs but we are not a sporty family and my co-ordination is shocking - I can't even ride a bike! Lord knows how I learnt to drive a car, using both my hands and feet at the same time! The other tests they did at the initial meeting was all simple, they got him talking about his family and the Dr said she had no real concerns about his understanding and his speech wasn't too bad. She noted that he didn't hold a pencil confidently but did not seem to have any major concerns.
My only concern was that both hubby and I have worries that he is not socially confident. He only really has one friend in school and that child is absent alot which means James is a bit of a loner. Again, we realise this could just be James' personality. He likes calm and quiet and doesn't need to be the centre of attention. He likes his space, he likes to think and do things his way. I just don't want him to be a social outcast and struggle to make friends in the future. Again, the Dr did not see this as a problem. She just said the same as James' current teacher that some children are just quiet and happy this way.
I do feel this is James' character and we are going to have a calm, collected, thoughtful little boy.
We go back in a few weeks to test his development. He'll do puzzles and do tasks they expect him to do by the age of 4/5 and see if he is behind on the things the schools and education department expect him to be at.
If he needs help to catch up, then he needs help. I have no worries about that. I would much rather have that than for him to fall by the wayside and struggle through school life.
Which brings me back to the original article:
KIDS LEARN AT THEIR OWN RATE. THEY ARE DIFFERENT. NOT EVERY CHILD IS THE SAME.
For every person out there, we all have strengths, we all have weaknesses. Even as adults, there's things millions of people can do and things millions can't.
We don't always need to be told "You should be doing this by now" as development really does vary with every individual.
I personally feel that we didn't need this meeting. The Dr did not raise any clear concerns but is following the right course of action for her job. She's ticking all her boxes through each stage. James' teachers set the ball rolling in nursery with their boxes and where they thought he was trailing and I've been the supportive mum that's just done as I've been recommended so should there be any issues, I know I have done everything I possibly can to help. I've taken the advice, I've done as instructed and now we wait for the next appointment.
James' current teacher has not raised any concerns herself and in two weeks time it will be his first parents evening so I will get more of an insight into how he is doing in class but we don't appear to be struggling.
James now gets home learning and has been doing so well with the picture books and telling the story the pictures show. He has also been doing "phonics". Instead of the old style "A,B,C" we learnt, they learn the sounds to help them put words together, James is recognising some 3 letter words already and although I am helping him with how to hold pens and pencils (one of his weaknesses) he is actually beginning to write 3 letter words as in Exhibit A:
Bear in mind, this was done a few days ago and now we can tick the boxes for "sat" and "pop" Yay James!
He is doing so well breaking up the words to get the sounds and this is a FABULOUS way for them to learn words. It does seem so much easier when they sound it out rather than say the alphabet with it.
Wherever all this goes from here, James is my boy and I am a very proud Mumma!
Recently my favourite teacher friend posted this to facebook.
http://www.today.com/moms/why-i-dont-force-my-kids-say-please-or-walk-1C7398514
It struck a chord immensely.
The "please" and "thank you" thing is irrelevant for this post but the whole message remains the same. Kids develop and progress at different rates.
On Friday I had to take James to the local Child Development Center. He had been referred from our GP as our nursery teachers had concerns about his abilities. From speech to "not making sounds when playing with toys" and his agility, they had concerns.
I, on the other hand, didn't.
Admittedly, James is a quiet child and learned to speak later than alot of other kids but at 6am there is nothing wrong with his speech or confidence in speaking. Together he and Liam have a lot of imaginary play first thing in the morning. They play "Holidays". They talk about what they are packing, what toys they want to take, what they want to do for fun, what they want for dinner that night, when they should go to bed. They chatter like the birds in the trees as the sun rises.
James is naturally a thinker. He won't jump in head first, he won't shout out, he's very analytical and assesses situations. He has HUGE problem solving abilities and completes tasks with ease on the Wii U when playing games. He realises when he makes mistakes and discovers how to solve issues and get past that.
James' old nursery teacher came along with me. She offered moral support as her son has also had dealings with the CDC and as a mum, she wanted to help, also as a teacher that has helped James get this far, she wanted to follow through on his progress. I LOVE Mrs W. She's a lovely lovely woman and I look upon her as more of a friend than a teacher, I just realise that we have differing views on my son. She has done her best in her capacity as a teacher and I've followed advice each step of the way on how to progress with James.
I am incredibly honest with her and told her that if she ever thought I appeared to be dismissive or defensive regarding her and Mrs F (James' other nursery teacher) then I apologise for that since I don't see James struggle with some of the things she's said about in the past. There was concerns that he didn't play a "pairs" game. He's done that since he was two! He probably didn't feel like it that day. He has times we play snap but changes the rules - Instead of being 2 identical cards as such, they match because they have the same colour, they are baddies, they are superheroes. He puts things into categories very well and is always trying to be one step ahead! I also explained that my main concern is James. I am not going to be upset if he needs extra help anywhere because that's how it is sometimes. I know I've done my best at home and his teachers are doing the best for him at school. I'm pleased they are giving me the information so we can work together to make James' life easier. I had to wait until Year 2, when Matthew was 7 before anyone listened to me and saw my behavioural concerns with him.
I also explained that sometimes I do get emotional. Not because I feel like I am being criticised or my child being "labelled" but because I just want to do whats best for them and really want to assist where I can.
A child at home can be incredibly different to a child they see in school and this seems the case with James.
He went through the basic assessment, Height, weight, shape of spine, measurements of head, development of hands and feet etc. Everything was spot on as it should be. He does run with a wonky run and balances with his arms as he runs but we are not a sporty family and my co-ordination is shocking - I can't even ride a bike! Lord knows how I learnt to drive a car, using both my hands and feet at the same time! The other tests they did at the initial meeting was all simple, they got him talking about his family and the Dr said she had no real concerns about his understanding and his speech wasn't too bad. She noted that he didn't hold a pencil confidently but did not seem to have any major concerns.
My only concern was that both hubby and I have worries that he is not socially confident. He only really has one friend in school and that child is absent alot which means James is a bit of a loner. Again, we realise this could just be James' personality. He likes calm and quiet and doesn't need to be the centre of attention. He likes his space, he likes to think and do things his way. I just don't want him to be a social outcast and struggle to make friends in the future. Again, the Dr did not see this as a problem. She just said the same as James' current teacher that some children are just quiet and happy this way.
I do feel this is James' character and we are going to have a calm, collected, thoughtful little boy.
We go back in a few weeks to test his development. He'll do puzzles and do tasks they expect him to do by the age of 4/5 and see if he is behind on the things the schools and education department expect him to be at.
If he needs help to catch up, then he needs help. I have no worries about that. I would much rather have that than for him to fall by the wayside and struggle through school life.
Which brings me back to the original article:
KIDS LEARN AT THEIR OWN RATE. THEY ARE DIFFERENT. NOT EVERY CHILD IS THE SAME.
For every person out there, we all have strengths, we all have weaknesses. Even as adults, there's things millions of people can do and things millions can't.
We don't always need to be told "You should be doing this by now" as development really does vary with every individual.
I personally feel that we didn't need this meeting. The Dr did not raise any clear concerns but is following the right course of action for her job. She's ticking all her boxes through each stage. James' teachers set the ball rolling in nursery with their boxes and where they thought he was trailing and I've been the supportive mum that's just done as I've been recommended so should there be any issues, I know I have done everything I possibly can to help. I've taken the advice, I've done as instructed and now we wait for the next appointment.
James' current teacher has not raised any concerns herself and in two weeks time it will be his first parents evening so I will get more of an insight into how he is doing in class but we don't appear to be struggling.
James now gets home learning and has been doing so well with the picture books and telling the story the pictures show. He has also been doing "phonics". Instead of the old style "A,B,C" we learnt, they learn the sounds to help them put words together, James is recognising some 3 letter words already and although I am helping him with how to hold pens and pencils (one of his weaknesses) he is actually beginning to write 3 letter words as in Exhibit A:
He is doing so well breaking up the words to get the sounds and this is a FABULOUS way for them to learn words. It does seem so much easier when they sound it out rather than say the alphabet with it.
Wherever all this goes from here, James is my boy and I am a very proud Mumma!
Friday, 20 September 2013
September, Oh How I Love Thee....
September really is one of my favourite months of the year. Birthdays are the main thing but I like it when it starts to get cooler but not too cold and not too wet. So, here's what has happened since the last post.
1. Baby boy is now 4. FOUR years of being a mother to 3 little boys and I really can't remember life before it. This is where I am supposed to be in the world.
2. Liam's birthday was centered on him. He went to nursery then daddy and I took him to the local soft play center. He LOVED it. There were only 4 other kids in there at the busiest time so he ran himself ragged for 3 hours.
3. We collected the big brothers from school and went out for a meal at a local public house. Liam had his favourite dinner of jacket potato with beans and cheese and a blackcurrant fruit shoot drink. The kids then played out in the park.
4. James surprised us with how co-ordinated he is these days and with his agility.
5. We then went home for birthday cake. Liam blew out the candle and the kids tucked into a third of a cake between them with squirty cream. The cake was supposed to serve 16!
6. Liam had been invited to a party on the Saturday before his birthday but we chose to go away for the weekend instead.
7. What a mistake that was! The weather was ok but there had been rain and the park had 6 inches of water at the bottom of the slides and under the swings. The kids indoor play area was over-run by older kids and the staff didn't seem to care. The entertainment was cringeworthy but fine if you like hearing "OMG" and "LOL" EVERY 30 SECONDS. It was too much. It hurt my brain. For the first time ever we left a getaway break early not feeling we could do it another day.
8. The day after was hubby's birthday. We dropped the kids in town and went for breakfast in a town restaurant. It was nice to have a rest day.
9. Hubby has run out of petrol TWICE this week. We've discovered that when the tank is low, we shouldn't park on a hill. Also, we've discovered that the fuel light that tells you that you are very low on petrol only seems to come on when it's virtually running on empty.
10. Today I have driven the car for the first time in about 8 weeks.
11. Liam has gone up a year in age but up about 3 or 4 years in tv preference. He no longer likes Disney JR but loves Disney XD. He now has 2 new favourite tv shows. Phineas and Ferb and Crash and Bernstein. How can it be so? My little man likes this sort of stuff already!
12. Still on the subject of Liam, he's being a bit of a naughty boy at school. Nothing major, just a case of being in a little trouble with his teachers for being a bit pushy and rough with other kids. Not spitefully, but just a bit "bumpy" when someone is in the way and being a little bossy. We think (and hope) it's because the dynamics have changed. He's no longer the little one, he knows he is one of the oldest in the class and is demonstrating that. He's always been the little one, the one at the bottom of the food chain so to speak so now he has found a new "power" of age, size and strength all in one go and is discovering new boundaries with his teachers.
13. Matthew and James are happy with their school and James is getting on very well with his new books. He's on the picture books before learning to read. He's doing so well and loves going into school.
14. I had my smear test last week. Nothing has come back yet so fingers crossed that is good. My nurse thought I may need a repeat one as she wasn't sure she had enough cells. So far I've not been recalled nor had a scary hospital letter.
15. Finally, this is my last weekend of being 32. Monday I turn 33 and head rapidly to my mid 30's. On Friday, bestie and I are off out for a curry and visiting some of the public houses in the village on a girls night out. I do actually like being in my 30's. I'm more self assured and confident in myself in these years. I am not trying to please others all the time, I'm happy to have my voice heard and I am happy to be able to do everything I need to for the kids. I've dedicated their early years to them and I would like to think that by this time next year or at least by the time I'm 36 I can be back at work with the knowledge that my children are in school and being looked after so I can think about contributing to the household. I just need to find a job that's ideally 9-3, Monday to Friday term time only and maybe, well, ideally, have a day in the week off too to catch up with friends and housework rather than squeeze it all into a weekend. I guess that is me and a few million other women wanting those hours. :)
1. Baby boy is now 4. FOUR years of being a mother to 3 little boys and I really can't remember life before it. This is where I am supposed to be in the world.
2. Liam's birthday was centered on him. He went to nursery then daddy and I took him to the local soft play center. He LOVED it. There were only 4 other kids in there at the busiest time so he ran himself ragged for 3 hours.
7. What a mistake that was! The weather was ok but there had been rain and the park had 6 inches of water at the bottom of the slides and under the swings. The kids indoor play area was over-run by older kids and the staff didn't seem to care. The entertainment was cringeworthy but fine if you like hearing "OMG" and "LOL" EVERY 30 SECONDS. It was too much. It hurt my brain. For the first time ever we left a getaway break early not feeling we could do it another day.
8. The day after was hubby's birthday. We dropped the kids in town and went for breakfast in a town restaurant. It was nice to have a rest day.
9. Hubby has run out of petrol TWICE this week. We've discovered that when the tank is low, we shouldn't park on a hill. Also, we've discovered that the fuel light that tells you that you are very low on petrol only seems to come on when it's virtually running on empty.
10. Today I have driven the car for the first time in about 8 weeks.
11. Liam has gone up a year in age but up about 3 or 4 years in tv preference. He no longer likes Disney JR but loves Disney XD. He now has 2 new favourite tv shows. Phineas and Ferb and Crash and Bernstein. How can it be so? My little man likes this sort of stuff already!
12. Still on the subject of Liam, he's being a bit of a naughty boy at school. Nothing major, just a case of being in a little trouble with his teachers for being a bit pushy and rough with other kids. Not spitefully, but just a bit "bumpy" when someone is in the way and being a little bossy. We think (and hope) it's because the dynamics have changed. He's no longer the little one, he knows he is one of the oldest in the class and is demonstrating that. He's always been the little one, the one at the bottom of the food chain so to speak so now he has found a new "power" of age, size and strength all in one go and is discovering new boundaries with his teachers.
13. Matthew and James are happy with their school and James is getting on very well with his new books. He's on the picture books before learning to read. He's doing so well and loves going into school.
14. I had my smear test last week. Nothing has come back yet so fingers crossed that is good. My nurse thought I may need a repeat one as she wasn't sure she had enough cells. So far I've not been recalled nor had a scary hospital letter.
15. Finally, this is my last weekend of being 32. Monday I turn 33 and head rapidly to my mid 30's. On Friday, bestie and I are off out for a curry and visiting some of the public houses in the village on a girls night out. I do actually like being in my 30's. I'm more self assured and confident in myself in these years. I am not trying to please others all the time, I'm happy to have my voice heard and I am happy to be able to do everything I need to for the kids. I've dedicated their early years to them and I would like to think that by this time next year or at least by the time I'm 36 I can be back at work with the knowledge that my children are in school and being looked after so I can think about contributing to the household. I just need to find a job that's ideally 9-3, Monday to Friday term time only and maybe, well, ideally, have a day in the week off too to catch up with friends and housework rather than squeeze it all into a weekend. I guess that is me and a few million other women wanting those hours. :)
Monday, 9 September 2013
10 Years
Yesterday would have been my 10th wedding anniversary.
What can I say about that?
I was 22, I was too old to be dubbed "too young" when I married. I made my choice, I had a baby on the way and I just got rolled away in the moment.
A moment that seemed out of my control. Life snowballed at an incredible rate and being pregnant, I thought it was for the best for baby.
I'm far from a control freak, though I often joke about it as I like to be organised - there is a difference but at the time I felt I was doing it for everyone else but myself. My baby, my ex, my family. Everyone seemed so excited for the first wedding in the immediate family since 1980, I was the first child and first grandchild, first niece to marry so there was alot of excitement surrounding it all.
Excitement from everyone but myself.
I didn't want to be a single mum. I didn't want baby to know his mum didn't try to make a go of it with his dad but I didn't want to keep on living in a hostile relationship.
I've said it before and I've said it again, the only reason I went through with it was because of fear of letting everyone else down.
But hey, that's all in the past. Thank God for divorce eh?
What can I say about that?
I was 22, I was too old to be dubbed "too young" when I married. I made my choice, I had a baby on the way and I just got rolled away in the moment.
A moment that seemed out of my control. Life snowballed at an incredible rate and being pregnant, I thought it was for the best for baby.
I'm far from a control freak, though I often joke about it as I like to be organised - there is a difference but at the time I felt I was doing it for everyone else but myself. My baby, my ex, my family. Everyone seemed so excited for the first wedding in the immediate family since 1980, I was the first child and first grandchild, first niece to marry so there was alot of excitement surrounding it all.
Excitement from everyone but myself.
I didn't want to be a single mum. I didn't want baby to know his mum didn't try to make a go of it with his dad but I didn't want to keep on living in a hostile relationship.
I've said it before and I've said it again, the only reason I went through with it was because of fear of letting everyone else down.
But hey, that's all in the past. Thank God for divorce eh?
Thursday, 5 September 2013
Return To School
Well, it's official. My little cherubs are back at school.
James looked great in his little uniform although I swear he's grown an inch or two as his trousers aren't so long as they were.
My poser James!
Under the tree at school.
My 3 boys on the way to school yesterday complete with book bags, pe bags and lunch.
The following photo shows that at times, James still has such a baby face!
Still so little and innocent looking.
The first day was a major success. He just went in as directed by his teachers and went off. He came out of school happy but tired and seemed to really enjoy his day.
This morning was a different story altogether.
He got ready great, walked to school brilliantly, even waited patiently as we were early. As the doors opened we were about halfway back and 2 kids in front began to cry. So James joined in. He was dragged in sobbing.
The routine in nursery was that parents take the children in, help them put away coats and bags and encourage them to find their name stickers for the attendance wall but this new routine is much more grown up. You say goodbye to mum or dad at the door and go straight into the classroom. Starting as the mean to go on.
It did not help this morning that I had to go in the door right next door (the one he used to use) with Liam as it was his first day today. Most kids in the reception class were quite happy settling in with each other sorting out book bags and the like with James and the other 3 crying kids didn't look at all happy.
James was shooting me evils for being in with Liam and putting on the most sorrowful, emotionally blackmailing face as he saw me across the room. I just waved my boys off and left. Horrid mother that I am. Ha!
I know it's all for show, I've seen it with other kids regularly and as soon as mum has gone, then the need for sympathy disperses by the time mum is out of sight.
I did catch sight of him later when I went to collect Liam. Needless to say, he was happy running about shouting and laughing with his best friend Ryan. The teacher let me pass him a hat over the school gate as it was blooming scorching hot today and he was happy to run back in ready for lunch when they were called in.
Liam LOVED his first day at the "BIG nursery" He is very fond of his teachers and came home with a painting and a paper plate covered in sticky stars. Liam is going to be the creative one. One of his teachers said he did cry at one point when they were getting ready to go home. He saw James playing outside and was upset that he had to sit down and wait to go rather than go back outside to play. He seemed very happy to be there, happy to get home and after a quick lunch promptly fell asleep on the sofa for a well earned nap!
Matthew is a typical "Big Boy" of school. When asked how his new teacher is, she's "alright". Does he think he'll be ok in that year? "Yeah". What did you do today Matthew? "Not much" What are you learning this term? "I don't know. Maths, English, books, bit of history - the normal!" Agh - When do males learn the art of conversation?!
So then, two days in and it's a bit of a settling in jobby for the next couple of weeks. Let's see if we have more tears tomorrow.......
James looked great in his little uniform although I swear he's grown an inch or two as his trousers aren't so long as they were.
The following photo shows that at times, James still has such a baby face!
The first day was a major success. He just went in as directed by his teachers and went off. He came out of school happy but tired and seemed to really enjoy his day.
This morning was a different story altogether.
He got ready great, walked to school brilliantly, even waited patiently as we were early. As the doors opened we were about halfway back and 2 kids in front began to cry. So James joined in. He was dragged in sobbing.
The routine in nursery was that parents take the children in, help them put away coats and bags and encourage them to find their name stickers for the attendance wall but this new routine is much more grown up. You say goodbye to mum or dad at the door and go straight into the classroom. Starting as the mean to go on.
It did not help this morning that I had to go in the door right next door (the one he used to use) with Liam as it was his first day today. Most kids in the reception class were quite happy settling in with each other sorting out book bags and the like with James and the other 3 crying kids didn't look at all happy.
James was shooting me evils for being in with Liam and putting on the most sorrowful, emotionally blackmailing face as he saw me across the room. I just waved my boys off and left. Horrid mother that I am. Ha!
I know it's all for show, I've seen it with other kids regularly and as soon as mum has gone, then the need for sympathy disperses by the time mum is out of sight.
I did catch sight of him later when I went to collect Liam. Needless to say, he was happy running about shouting and laughing with his best friend Ryan. The teacher let me pass him a hat over the school gate as it was blooming scorching hot today and he was happy to run back in ready for lunch when they were called in.
Liam LOVED his first day at the "BIG nursery" He is very fond of his teachers and came home with a painting and a paper plate covered in sticky stars. Liam is going to be the creative one. One of his teachers said he did cry at one point when they were getting ready to go home. He saw James playing outside and was upset that he had to sit down and wait to go rather than go back outside to play. He seemed very happy to be there, happy to get home and after a quick lunch promptly fell asleep on the sofa for a well earned nap!
Matthew is a typical "Big Boy" of school. When asked how his new teacher is, she's "alright". Does he think he'll be ok in that year? "Yeah". What did you do today Matthew? "Not much" What are you learning this term? "I don't know. Maths, English, books, bit of history - the normal!" Agh - When do males learn the art of conversation?!
So then, two days in and it's a bit of a settling in jobby for the next couple of weeks. Let's see if we have more tears tomorrow.......
Tuesday, 3 September 2013
September September September
It seems no time at all since we began thinking of the school holidays.
Tomorrow my big boys go back. We then have a home appointment with 2 of Liams teachers then he begins his new nursery on Thursday.
Where has the Summer gone?
Last week we noticed an abundance of berries on bushes and trees, the leaves are already turning and falling, the nights getting longer.
Summer in England has been good this year. I note this now as it's been against the normal pattern for the last few years of hot but wet. Let's be honest,on the whole we Brits LOVE to talk about the weather, we LOVE to complain about it. It's too hot, too cold, too wet. We'll find something to complain about. In the summer it's light too early, the kids won't sleep as it's light too late. We have people who complain about the lot.
I however, always state to be a realist and I enjoy the little bits of nature that we can't control. I like the light evenings, I like the bright mornings. I don't even mind if we have a wet summer. We are an Island, rather a small island compared to many places and common sense denotes that islands tend to be wetter. Why? Water surrounds us, the water cycle is something we all learn young (Year 2 or age 7 over here) but it seems 90% of people forget that. They don't seem to understand the laws of science that states that the hotter it gets, in theory, the more water is evaporated into the sky, creates clouds and therefor rains. Air pressure has been different this year so we have had a drier summer but we recently had a really bad rain storm which caused a lot of flooding not too far from where we live.
Last week, I had a moment and got my hair cut shorter. About 6 inches shorter to a choppy jaw length bob. Whilst I don't hate it it's something I am getting used to. I will be growing it long again.
Two weeks ago, we were rather busy with the electrics. Tv on, computer on, all general things working as normal, heating the oven for dinner and so forth when the power went off. It turned out something had tripped the fuse. We restarted everything and it went again after about 15 seconds. Worried about electrics we unplugged a few things in the living room and tried again. This time all was fine. We, for some reason decided to boycott the original plan for dinner and get a takeaway. The next day was our anniversary so I cooked Steak, chips, salad and the like. The Thursday I put the oven on to do lunch and after 30 minutes I realised that the oven wasn't heating up. The fan was on, the light was on, no heat. So I did a little investigation work a la Google to discover the element that heats the electric oven had gone. We were able to use the hob and top oven in the mean time (dual oven) but it was frustrating that the main oven wasn't working. We got it fixed last week for a nice little set back of £72. We could have got the part off ebay for £10 but whilst hubby is normally good at DIY type things, he didn't want to risk taking apart our £600 cooker and getting it wrong. He intently watched as the repair man did the job and said if it ever happened again he'd be able to do it.
When the kids are back at school I am going to start baking again. I haven't made a cake for a while but I want to do one and I have an idea for Liams birthday cake in a couple of weeks. I just want to practice it first. Watch this space.
Tomorrow my big boys go back. We then have a home appointment with 2 of Liams teachers then he begins his new nursery on Thursday.
Where has the Summer gone?
Last week we noticed an abundance of berries on bushes and trees, the leaves are already turning and falling, the nights getting longer.
Summer in England has been good this year. I note this now as it's been against the normal pattern for the last few years of hot but wet. Let's be honest,on the whole we Brits LOVE to talk about the weather, we LOVE to complain about it. It's too hot, too cold, too wet. We'll find something to complain about. In the summer it's light too early, the kids won't sleep as it's light too late. We have people who complain about the lot.
I however, always state to be a realist and I enjoy the little bits of nature that we can't control. I like the light evenings, I like the bright mornings. I don't even mind if we have a wet summer. We are an Island, rather a small island compared to many places and common sense denotes that islands tend to be wetter. Why? Water surrounds us, the water cycle is something we all learn young (Year 2 or age 7 over here) but it seems 90% of people forget that. They don't seem to understand the laws of science that states that the hotter it gets, in theory, the more water is evaporated into the sky, creates clouds and therefor rains. Air pressure has been different this year so we have had a drier summer but we recently had a really bad rain storm which caused a lot of flooding not too far from where we live.
Last week, I had a moment and got my hair cut shorter. About 6 inches shorter to a choppy jaw length bob. Whilst I don't hate it it's something I am getting used to. I will be growing it long again.
Two weeks ago, we were rather busy with the electrics. Tv on, computer on, all general things working as normal, heating the oven for dinner and so forth when the power went off. It turned out something had tripped the fuse. We restarted everything and it went again after about 15 seconds. Worried about electrics we unplugged a few things in the living room and tried again. This time all was fine. We, for some reason decided to boycott the original plan for dinner and get a takeaway. The next day was our anniversary so I cooked Steak, chips, salad and the like. The Thursday I put the oven on to do lunch and after 30 minutes I realised that the oven wasn't heating up. The fan was on, the light was on, no heat. So I did a little investigation work a la Google to discover the element that heats the electric oven had gone. We were able to use the hob and top oven in the mean time (dual oven) but it was frustrating that the main oven wasn't working. We got it fixed last week for a nice little set back of £72. We could have got the part off ebay for £10 but whilst hubby is normally good at DIY type things, he didn't want to risk taking apart our £600 cooker and getting it wrong. He intently watched as the repair man did the job and said if it ever happened again he'd be able to do it.
When the kids are back at school I am going to start baking again. I haven't made a cake for a while but I want to do one and I have an idea for Liams birthday cake in a couple of weeks. I just want to practice it first. Watch this space.
Wednesday, 28 August 2013
Anniversary Weekend - The Third One
I thought I had better catch up whilst I have 5 minutes of sanity in the house. Ok, I admit, that's probably the biggest lie I've told in a while. That only occurs when they are at school. I am just choosing to ignore them for half an hour. The kids are beginning to drive me mad.
The weekend away was just what I needed but a week and a half later it all seems a distant memory already.
We left bright and early on the Saturday morning and our first port of call was the city of Ely. We did a quick wander around the town area. It was a beautiful little place. It's a city in the "old rites". By this I mean, compared to other towns and certainly to other cities, Ely is quite a small place but going back to when the town earned city status it would have been high in population and a thriving area. These days it seems like an average town in size but boasts of this beautiful Cathedral.
We actually stayed at St Ives in Cambridgeshire. A pretty little town that is about half an hour away from Ely or about an hour from home. The town was a little smaller than Ely but had lots going on. We went on market day and it was busy but a lovely environment.
We were lucky to be staying somewhere incredibly central. The picture above shows our hotel as the white building just in front of the church. We stayed in a lovely room in a pub that looked traditional from the outside but the inside was very very modern and a great place. They warned on the booking website that they had live DJ's at the weekend but they were very fair when it came to finishing times. Not that hubby and I worry. We're always happy to be up late and it's nice that we can chill in the same building we're sleeping in.
We arrived early and took a little tour of the town first. We had a nice walk around somewhere completely new and decided to stop for a drink at one of the many pubs. The pub we went to was situated on a beautiful river and this was the view as we sat outside.
There are a number of boathouses along the river and being a Saturday afternoon, the river was busy with the odd boat on a little cruise. It was lovely relaxing in the sun child free.
We booked in at the hotel, dropped off the bags and er.... well, ya know, kid free.... anniversary.... you catch my drift.... spent a bit of time in our room and dozed whilst watching a film before getting ready for our evening out.
I had had a headache half the day but a little snooze seemed to make it better. How wrong I was! We went to a very trendy pub and whilst I had a glass of wine, I began to feel really sick as well as having the back end of my headache. I began to feel more and more sick to the point I really didn't think I could eat but we'd made a reservation in a tiny chinese restaurant (All the restaurants apart from the pubs were small due to the traditional style of the town) and hubby said it was just probably because I hadn't eaten much. So I settled for a glass of water with my meal, It was like a buffet restaurant but instead of getting the food yourself, they bring the food to you freshly cooked as 6 courses. Course 1 was a chinese starter platter. Sesame prawn toast. Coconut Chicken. Squid in tempura batter. Crispy Seaweed. Satay chicken. Prawn Crackers with dips and I am sure there was more but as soon as I started eating I DID begin to feel better. I didn't think I'd manage much food at all but once I started I felt so much better it was amazing the transformation. We then had soup, followed by crispy lamb pancakes with hoi sin sauce, spring onion and cucumber, followed by a meat main - I chose a light battered king prawns with sweet and sour sauce and a side of noodles with beansprouts. We could have had seconds of any of the courses but we found that we had had enough. It was a very enjoyable meal and the staff were top standard. They were sweet, funny, knowledgable and made us feel very welcome. We'd certainly go back there again.
After that we went back to the hotel bar (It was getting on for 10.30pm) and enjoyed a drink on the terrace watching all the really drunk people in the smoking area below. It was rather funny. The pub was vibrant and looked to be thriving. At 11.30pm as they said, they called Last Orders. The music stopped at 11.45 and they began requesting people to leave at 12. Most of the revellers appeared to be heading to a club down the road but we had been up early, plus we're old and not into clubs anymore, so we headed off to bed.
In the morning we had a freshly cooked English Breakfast in the hotel which was included in our booking deal. It was excellent quality and again, the waitress was very good and left a great lasting impression of St Ives and The Golden Lion Hotel in general. (Click it for more pictures and details)
On the Sunday morning we had a quick trip to one of our favourite shops kiddy free and got one of Liams birthday presents. Sometimes, it's just nice to see things and go places without the distraction of small people who don't want to be there.
We were home fairly early due to hubby having to take his mum home.
We didn't do much on our anniversary itself as we'd done the weekend away and on the Tuesday hubby bought a little surprise home from work.
This is Tilly, the newest member of the family. She was found on one of hubby's work sites and is officially a stray so rather than have her come to harm in a big water tank, he bought her home. The kids love her and she seems to have grown so much in a week already.
We don't know how she got to the water works. The nearest houses are 5 miles away so she either got out too early and got lost or was dumped in a field. We don't have any idea how old she is so we will have to get her along to the local vets to determine that and when to get her sterilised. She's really good, very playful and she must have had some time in a family home as she knew how to work the cat litter tray straight away so apart from being a little skinny, she wasn't neglected. She isn't allowed out for another 2 weeks but she seems very happy.
The weekend away was just what I needed but a week and a half later it all seems a distant memory already.
We left bright and early on the Saturday morning and our first port of call was the city of Ely. We did a quick wander around the town area. It was a beautiful little place. It's a city in the "old rites". By this I mean, compared to other towns and certainly to other cities, Ely is quite a small place but going back to when the town earned city status it would have been high in population and a thriving area. These days it seems like an average town in size but boasts of this beautiful Cathedral.
We actually stayed at St Ives in Cambridgeshire. A pretty little town that is about half an hour away from Ely or about an hour from home. The town was a little smaller than Ely but had lots going on. We went on market day and it was busy but a lovely environment.
We booked in at the hotel, dropped off the bags and er.... well, ya know, kid free.... anniversary.... you catch my drift.... spent a bit of time in our room and dozed whilst watching a film before getting ready for our evening out.
I had had a headache half the day but a little snooze seemed to make it better. How wrong I was! We went to a very trendy pub and whilst I had a glass of wine, I began to feel really sick as well as having the back end of my headache. I began to feel more and more sick to the point I really didn't think I could eat but we'd made a reservation in a tiny chinese restaurant (All the restaurants apart from the pubs were small due to the traditional style of the town) and hubby said it was just probably because I hadn't eaten much. So I settled for a glass of water with my meal, It was like a buffet restaurant but instead of getting the food yourself, they bring the food to you freshly cooked as 6 courses. Course 1 was a chinese starter platter. Sesame prawn toast. Coconut Chicken. Squid in tempura batter. Crispy Seaweed. Satay chicken. Prawn Crackers with dips and I am sure there was more but as soon as I started eating I DID begin to feel better. I didn't think I'd manage much food at all but once I started I felt so much better it was amazing the transformation. We then had soup, followed by crispy lamb pancakes with hoi sin sauce, spring onion and cucumber, followed by a meat main - I chose a light battered king prawns with sweet and sour sauce and a side of noodles with beansprouts. We could have had seconds of any of the courses but we found that we had had enough. It was a very enjoyable meal and the staff were top standard. They were sweet, funny, knowledgable and made us feel very welcome. We'd certainly go back there again.
After that we went back to the hotel bar (It was getting on for 10.30pm) and enjoyed a drink on the terrace watching all the really drunk people in the smoking area below. It was rather funny. The pub was vibrant and looked to be thriving. At 11.30pm as they said, they called Last Orders. The music stopped at 11.45 and they began requesting people to leave at 12. Most of the revellers appeared to be heading to a club down the road but we had been up early, plus we're old and not into clubs anymore, so we headed off to bed.
In the morning we had a freshly cooked English Breakfast in the hotel which was included in our booking deal. It was excellent quality and again, the waitress was very good and left a great lasting impression of St Ives and The Golden Lion Hotel in general. (Click it for more pictures and details)
On the Sunday morning we had a quick trip to one of our favourite shops kiddy free and got one of Liams birthday presents. Sometimes, it's just nice to see things and go places without the distraction of small people who don't want to be there.
We were home fairly early due to hubby having to take his mum home.
We didn't do much on our anniversary itself as we'd done the weekend away and on the Tuesday hubby bought a little surprise home from work.
We don't know how she got to the water works. The nearest houses are 5 miles away so she either got out too early and got lost or was dumped in a field. We don't have any idea how old she is so we will have to get her along to the local vets to determine that and when to get her sterilised. She's really good, very playful and she must have had some time in a family home as she knew how to work the cat litter tray straight away so apart from being a little skinny, she wasn't neglected. She isn't allowed out for another 2 weeks but she seems very happy.
Wednesday, 21 August 2013
Three Years
Sometimes it's just easier to steal the words of Bon Jovi......
"Thank You For Loving Me"
It's hard for me to say the things
I want to say sometimes
There's no one here but you and me
And that broken old street light
Lock the doors
We'll leave the world outside
All I've got to give to you
Are these five words tonight
Thank you for loving me
For being my eyes
When I couldn't see
For parting my lips
When I couldn't breathe
Thank you for loving me
Thank you for loving me
I never knew I had a dream
Until that dream was you
When I look into your eyes
The sky's a different blue
Cross my heart
I wear no disguise
If I tried, you'd make believe
That you believed my lies
Thank you for loving me
For being my eyes
When I couldn't see
For parting my lips
When I couldn't breathe
Thank you for loving me
You pick me up when I fall down
You ring the bell before they count me out
If I was drowning you would part the sea
And risk your own life to rescue me
Lock the doors
We'll leave the world outside
All I've got to give to you
Are these five words tonight
Thank you for loving me
For being my eyes
When I couldn't see
You parted my lips
When I couldn't breathe
Thank you for loving me
When I couldn't fly
Oh, you gave me wings
You parted my lips
When I couldn't breathe
Thank you for loving me
Friday, 16 August 2013
Good Bits and Bad Bits
Bonjour dearest friends.
I've been trying to update for a week but I have so much going through my crazy little mind I didn't have a point to start nor stop. I had plans for all sorts of posts yet they never came to fruition but in short, here's a little mish-mash of everything I can find.
1) Liam is 100% off nappies. 2 weeks, no nappies, 2 wet beds. 1 was the very first night and the second was the first night I didn't take him to the toilet when I went to bed myself. Every other night he did it himself with success. So that's it, no more babies, no more toddlers, just big boys in my house now!
2) These pictures amaze me. Photo 1 is my instagram photo of the little man himself.
Picture 2 is his great great great paternal grandmother, that' his dad's nan's nan or his great nan's nan. My mother in law has been working on the family tree and found this picture of his great ancestor Anne who was born in 1868. They have the same nose, the same mouth and very similar eyes. It's AMAZING that the web can find such treasures. I'm very interested to see what else the family tree brings up.
3) Hubby was sleep talking the other night and it was so funny. I was having one of my "awake when I should be asleep" episodes and I turned over to get more comfortable he said to me "Don't knock into me, I'm shooting!" I replied "You're shooting?" and he responded, "Yes, shooting, watch out!" Before anyone worries that my hubby gas some odd tendencies towards firearms, I'll just point out that country living seems to have soaked into us both. A few of his work friends regularly go out game hunting, shooting pheasants and partridges and other game birds and he has been invited along a few times and has expressed an interest but I don't know if he'll ever go. It's an expensive "sport" even if you do shoot your own dinner.
4) James appears to have a wobbly tooth. He's not 5 for almost 3 months and it's one of the teeth he hurt a couple of years back so hopefully it's a good sign that it's growing ok underneath. The other tooth is still up in his gum and we'll have to see what happens about that but the other one looks promising.
5) I've been feeling a bit bleugh, this week. Not down, not unwell, just "off" I can't explain it. Maybe it's a bit of Mother Nature reminding me that even though I don't have the monthly visit from AF, I still have female bits and female emotions. I've been just, angsty, angry at the world and worn out. You know, that proper PMT feeling where all humankind are annoying, especially the male ones who make a mess and don't clear it up. Kids who leave Lego everywhere and generally.....er... generally feeling like I did when I was pregnant with the boys.
6) The kids have been playing together great this week but I am getting fed up of the school holidays now. They seem to be dragging now. I know in the US and Canada thoughts are heading towards going back to school but we still have another 2 and a half weeks to go. James and Matthew go back September 4th and Liam begins September 5th. So we still have quite a time to go.
7) We have most of James' school kit. He just needs PE shirts. I only want one but they sell them in packs of 3. I find this annoying!
8) Last week I made my 25lb diet goal. This week I haven't stopped eating and put on 3lbs. Poo.
9) Hubby is finishing work early today, picking up his mum and bringing her back for a nice Indian meal tonight and she will sleep over tonight so we can be on our way nice and early tomorrow for our day/night out in Cambridgeshire tomorrow. I am looking forward to a "mummy day off" These are very few and far between.
10) I always say every year seems to have a theme. This year seems to be focussed upon marriage. Whilst a lot of friends are marrying this year, I know of 6 couples celebrating their 10th wedding anniversary (If I hadn't left my ex, it would be my 10th anniversary next year too) and 2013 seems to be a year for break ups too. Whilst a marriage breakup is sad for all involved, it's also a very PERSONAL thing and I will never judge anyone on their reasons. For some, it's a release from an unhappy place and can make a person a much better person. This is how I felt with my marriage split and I know it's like that for someone else. It's only letting go of someone when you realise that life can really be good. I'm no expert on the case of marriage, separation or divorce, but alot of my understanding of it all came after time. Over the years, I've looked back and that I realised that the main things that caused us to split were just the icing on the cake. Looking back, there were so many other things where I felt I was being taken for granted, that I wasn't happy about that situation, that sometimes, I don't think I was ever happy with him. I just got carried away in the "new romance" stage, fell pregnant, married and it all just snowballed. So much happened so quick and at times I felt powerless as to how quick everything happened and I felt SO MUCH GUILT. I felt I had to marry for my unborn baby, he deserved a family. I felt I should marry for the sake of my family and to keep him and them happy. The only person I wasn't keeping happy in this crazy crazy time was myself.
Unfortunately it took an unhappy marriage to realise exactly what I didn't want in relationships but when I met hubby 2, everything seemed right. Admittedly, James and Liam did come along quickly but we were happy and it wasn't the kids what kept us together. We were happy from the beginning, he took on and stood up to my stupid ex and was happy to take on a stepson where many men would run for the hills. Even though this was a whirlwind relationship (I don't do things by halves!) it was the opposite of the last. It took time to meet the right person, I dabbled with dating before I met him but have never looked back. We married within 3 years of being together, we had the kids, did the house move then married so it was fully back to front compared to "conventional" families. But what is conventional these days.
11) Remind me to do that post on "Parental Politics" I've done similar before but I have new ideas on school run mum.
12) I've been reading more again this week. 4 books in a week is good. One on Guilt Free Parenting (very funny hence my inspiration for number 11) and 3 murder mysteries. Two were short books and 1 really was rather poor to be quite honest but my newest book was the best book I have read in a long time. I will certainly be looking out for more from this author.
13) I'm feeling rather happy and chirpy today so I'm going to share my favourite song of the year so far. I can't wait until the album comes out on Sept 16th - my bubba's birthday:
Not normally a fan of the "country sound" but I love this DJ!
I've been trying to update for a week but I have so much going through my crazy little mind I didn't have a point to start nor stop. I had plans for all sorts of posts yet they never came to fruition but in short, here's a little mish-mash of everything I can find.
1) Liam is 100% off nappies. 2 weeks, no nappies, 2 wet beds. 1 was the very first night and the second was the first night I didn't take him to the toilet when I went to bed myself. Every other night he did it himself with success. So that's it, no more babies, no more toddlers, just big boys in my house now!
2) These pictures amaze me. Photo 1 is my instagram photo of the little man himself.
3) Hubby was sleep talking the other night and it was so funny. I was having one of my "awake when I should be asleep" episodes and I turned over to get more comfortable he said to me "Don't knock into me, I'm shooting!" I replied "You're shooting?" and he responded, "Yes, shooting, watch out!" Before anyone worries that my hubby gas some odd tendencies towards firearms, I'll just point out that country living seems to have soaked into us both. A few of his work friends regularly go out game hunting, shooting pheasants and partridges and other game birds and he has been invited along a few times and has expressed an interest but I don't know if he'll ever go. It's an expensive "sport" even if you do shoot your own dinner.
4) James appears to have a wobbly tooth. He's not 5 for almost 3 months and it's one of the teeth he hurt a couple of years back so hopefully it's a good sign that it's growing ok underneath. The other tooth is still up in his gum and we'll have to see what happens about that but the other one looks promising.
5) I've been feeling a bit bleugh, this week. Not down, not unwell, just "off" I can't explain it. Maybe it's a bit of Mother Nature reminding me that even though I don't have the monthly visit from AF, I still have female bits and female emotions. I've been just, angsty, angry at the world and worn out. You know, that proper PMT feeling where all humankind are annoying, especially the male ones who make a mess and don't clear it up. Kids who leave Lego everywhere and generally.....er... generally feeling like I did when I was pregnant with the boys.
6) The kids have been playing together great this week but I am getting fed up of the school holidays now. They seem to be dragging now. I know in the US and Canada thoughts are heading towards going back to school but we still have another 2 and a half weeks to go. James and Matthew go back September 4th and Liam begins September 5th. So we still have quite a time to go.
7) We have most of James' school kit. He just needs PE shirts. I only want one but they sell them in packs of 3. I find this annoying!
8) Last week I made my 25lb diet goal. This week I haven't stopped eating and put on 3lbs. Poo.
9) Hubby is finishing work early today, picking up his mum and bringing her back for a nice Indian meal tonight and she will sleep over tonight so we can be on our way nice and early tomorrow for our day/night out in Cambridgeshire tomorrow. I am looking forward to a "mummy day off" These are very few and far between.
10) I always say every year seems to have a theme. This year seems to be focussed upon marriage. Whilst a lot of friends are marrying this year, I know of 6 couples celebrating their 10th wedding anniversary (If I hadn't left my ex, it would be my 10th anniversary next year too) and 2013 seems to be a year for break ups too. Whilst a marriage breakup is sad for all involved, it's also a very PERSONAL thing and I will never judge anyone on their reasons. For some, it's a release from an unhappy place and can make a person a much better person. This is how I felt with my marriage split and I know it's like that for someone else. It's only letting go of someone when you realise that life can really be good. I'm no expert on the case of marriage, separation or divorce, but alot of my understanding of it all came after time. Over the years, I've looked back and that I realised that the main things that caused us to split were just the icing on the cake. Looking back, there were so many other things where I felt I was being taken for granted, that I wasn't happy about that situation, that sometimes, I don't think I was ever happy with him. I just got carried away in the "new romance" stage, fell pregnant, married and it all just snowballed. So much happened so quick and at times I felt powerless as to how quick everything happened and I felt SO MUCH GUILT. I felt I had to marry for my unborn baby, he deserved a family. I felt I should marry for the sake of my family and to keep him and them happy. The only person I wasn't keeping happy in this crazy crazy time was myself.
Unfortunately it took an unhappy marriage to realise exactly what I didn't want in relationships but when I met hubby 2, everything seemed right. Admittedly, James and Liam did come along quickly but we were happy and it wasn't the kids what kept us together. We were happy from the beginning, he took on and stood up to my stupid ex and was happy to take on a stepson where many men would run for the hills. Even though this was a whirlwind relationship (I don't do things by halves!) it was the opposite of the last. It took time to meet the right person, I dabbled with dating before I met him but have never looked back. We married within 3 years of being together, we had the kids, did the house move then married so it was fully back to front compared to "conventional" families. But what is conventional these days.
11) Remind me to do that post on "Parental Politics" I've done similar before but I have new ideas on school run mum.
12) I've been reading more again this week. 4 books in a week is good. One on Guilt Free Parenting (very funny hence my inspiration for number 11) and 3 murder mysteries. Two were short books and 1 really was rather poor to be quite honest but my newest book was the best book I have read in a long time. I will certainly be looking out for more from this author.
13) I'm feeling rather happy and chirpy today so I'm going to share my favourite song of the year so far. I can't wait until the album comes out on Sept 16th - my bubba's birthday:
Not normally a fan of the "country sound" but I love this DJ!
Wednesday, 7 August 2013
24.5 and other numbers
I don't often talk about my weight in this blog. I save most of that for the Weight Watchers blog and members community boards but there is something in me this time that makes me determined to succeed. As of my weigh in last Saturday I am 0.5lb from 25lb and therefor, 3.5lbs from my 2 stone marker. I have a long long way to go but I am feeling so much better, happier with myself and confident these days it's been worth every bit of hard work watching what I eat, exercising and worth every penny I've spent. (Membership costs £11 per month which I find VERY reasonable)
Right now I am really into my Just Dance on the Wii. I am getting better every time I go on, my scores rise and I feel my arms working hard. I walk alot which helps the bottom, thighs and legs so overall I have a good body system going.
I really want to meet that 3.5lb weight loss goal by next Saturday (Aug 17th) as hubby and I are having a day out followed by a hotel stay to celebrate our third wedding anniversary. THREE years of marriage already! Wow. That's longer than my first marriage and we've still never had a single falling out. hehe.
It's funny to think that when we first met I was actually still married.
Bad bad girl. wink wink.
I used to tease him that he only wanted me as I was a married woman and he wanted the challenge. I even mentioned it the other day and he admitted he'd forgotten that I was married when we met.
Of course, I was separated and in the process of divorce but for the average person, it can take some time. Last week, about 4 weeks after their public problems and 3 weeks after divorce was mentioned, Nigella Lawson and her husband Charles Saatchi divorced over a 90 second court meeting. The Power of money. I was in limbo awaiting a divorce for almost 2 years. There were "technical issues". Namely that my solicitor lost her license for legal aid funding. As I was a single mum who initiated the divorce I didn't have to pay. We had no assets to fight over so it was a simple case of getting the marriage annulled. However, she left 9 months in and a new solicitor took over all her cases as well as her own and in January 2009 the divorce was finally official despite the separation taking place in May 2007 and I met hubby November 2008.
Looking back, those dates seem so far away now. So much in life has changed and mostly for the better.
So, all of a sudden we're looking forward to a lovely little night off to enjoy our 3 years of marriage and plan to have a nice meal out, a few drinks and enjoy a real date night.
Right now I am really into my Just Dance on the Wii. I am getting better every time I go on, my scores rise and I feel my arms working hard. I walk alot which helps the bottom, thighs and legs so overall I have a good body system going.
I really want to meet that 3.5lb weight loss goal by next Saturday (Aug 17th) as hubby and I are having a day out followed by a hotel stay to celebrate our third wedding anniversary. THREE years of marriage already! Wow. That's longer than my first marriage and we've still never had a single falling out. hehe.
It's funny to think that when we first met I was actually still married.
Bad bad girl. wink wink.
I used to tease him that he only wanted me as I was a married woman and he wanted the challenge. I even mentioned it the other day and he admitted he'd forgotten that I was married when we met.
Of course, I was separated and in the process of divorce but for the average person, it can take some time. Last week, about 4 weeks after their public problems and 3 weeks after divorce was mentioned, Nigella Lawson and her husband Charles Saatchi divorced over a 90 second court meeting. The Power of money. I was in limbo awaiting a divorce for almost 2 years. There were "technical issues". Namely that my solicitor lost her license for legal aid funding. As I was a single mum who initiated the divorce I didn't have to pay. We had no assets to fight over so it was a simple case of getting the marriage annulled. However, she left 9 months in and a new solicitor took over all her cases as well as her own and in January 2009 the divorce was finally official despite the separation taking place in May 2007 and I met hubby November 2008.
Looking back, those dates seem so far away now. So much in life has changed and mostly for the better.
So, all of a sudden we're looking forward to a lovely little night off to enjoy our 3 years of marriage and plan to have a nice meal out, a few drinks and enjoy a real date night.
Wednesday, 31 July 2013
Numbers and Pictures.
It's now Wednesday afternoon and I have been trying to get a blog started since Sunday morning however, being the school holidays means we are busier than ever but here is my little window to get on with somewhat of a picture post as I have not done one for SO long.
So.... What has been going on in the last 2 and a half weeks.
1) The Royal Baby was born. A boy called George. Even over a week old, I still have the urge to break into a vocal performance of Karma Chameleon.
2) Cory Monteith died of a heroin overdose. That's scary, he never seemed "the type".
3) Liam has left playgroup. I cried.
4) The school fundraiser we had organised as a parents committee type thing a me jig summer school fete raised over £1000.
5) We were in the local paper for it:
That's me, Matthew and James on the left with some of the other mums and kids. Liam didn't want to be in the picture
6) Full story HERE if you wish to have a look.
7) As much as I have enjoyed the past 6 months, I have decided not to go back to the school volunteering in nursery and reception this year.
8) I have decided that I will volunteer at the local playgroup instead. Due to the mass exodus off to nursery this year they are down to just 6 children. This means that with a skeletal number of kids and 2 nursery nurses on maternity leave they have a severe staffing problems. Another member of staff has left to become a nanny and that leaves 2 nursery nurses and I would happily help them out as they need the help that bit more than the fully staffed school that has students for work experience and other parent helpers.
9) We went on holiday.
10) These 4 photo's are some of my favourites of the year so far:
11) James has his school uniform!
There will be many more to come when he starts school in September.
12) I'm rather emotional lately. In a happy way. So much happiness about, I am easy to get tears in the eyes.
13) I was never like this before I had kids but I was never this proud of things I'd achieved in my life before.
14) This is also a symptom of my hay fever which has been rather nasty this year.
15) I found on holiday that I was incredibly broody seeing all the babies and little toddlers about. Since being home, it's not been that bad.
So that's pretty much most of July covered. Love and Happiness to all for August.
So.... What has been going on in the last 2 and a half weeks.
1) The Royal Baby was born. A boy called George. Even over a week old, I still have the urge to break into a vocal performance of Karma Chameleon.
2) Cory Monteith died of a heroin overdose. That's scary, he never seemed "the type".
3) Liam has left playgroup. I cried.
4) The school fundraiser we had organised as a parents committee type thing a me jig summer school fete raised over £1000.
5) We were in the local paper for it:
6) Full story HERE if you wish to have a look.
7) As much as I have enjoyed the past 6 months, I have decided not to go back to the school volunteering in nursery and reception this year.
8) I have decided that I will volunteer at the local playgroup instead. Due to the mass exodus off to nursery this year they are down to just 6 children. This means that with a skeletal number of kids and 2 nursery nurses on maternity leave they have a severe staffing problems. Another member of staff has left to become a nanny and that leaves 2 nursery nurses and I would happily help them out as they need the help that bit more than the fully staffed school that has students for work experience and other parent helpers.
9) We went on holiday.
10) These 4 photo's are some of my favourites of the year so far:
There will be many more to come when he starts school in September.
12) I'm rather emotional lately. In a happy way. So much happiness about, I am easy to get tears in the eyes.
13) I was never like this before I had kids but I was never this proud of things I'd achieved in my life before.
14) This is also a symptom of my hay fever which has been rather nasty this year.
15) I found on holiday that I was incredibly broody seeing all the babies and little toddlers about. Since being home, it's not been that bad.
So that's pretty much most of July covered. Love and Happiness to all for August.
Sunday, 14 July 2013
That Balance Between The Bubble And Reality With Kids.
Today we wake up to the shocking passing of Cory Monteith of Glee.
He was found deceased in his hotel room by staff after failing to check out of his room on time. The reason is yet to be discovered but the British press is very quick to jump to the previous media stories of his stints in rehab.
Of course, this could be a completely innocent. Sudden Adult Death Syndrome can happen to anyone at anytime or he could have had an underlying medical condition such as a heart defect but sadly, the way the press are reporting the story, they are very much speculating that drugs may be involved. Whether it be accidental or intentional remains to be seen as the actor also struggled publicly with depression. Again, whether it was depression that lead to alcohol and drug abuse or the other way round, we should respect that a young man has lost his life too soon.
We live in an incredibly judgemental world.
A world where it's easy to find someone else to blame, someone else to accuse and any factor for just about anything these days.
Right now his family and friends and many fans are in mourning for a young man who meant alot to them all.
It's ALWAYS easy to say you should never take drugs or drink to excess. We don't always know the reasons why people start. For some it is something they can remain strong with but for others it's a long downward spiral. It was well documented he started drinking heavily young and was in rehab for alcohol at 19, he's since been in for drugs. The last time he left rehab was just April. He had tried to get help but sadly, it looks like it wasn't enough.
Again, I repeat this may NOT be anything to do with drugs, but since I am writing this post I am proving to be just as judgemental and quick to jump to conclusions as much as everyone else. (I never said I was perfect!)
Having 3 boys, drugs is one of my main worries as they grow older. I have already spoken with Matthew today about the dangers of drugs. He's a smart boy but easily influenced. Education is a big part of prevention when it comes to the things teenagers could do. I'd rather be honest with Matthew and educate him right than to have him try things because he doesn't understand them. Yet, I don't want him to rebel and try them regardless either.
I know I am writing alot about parenting lately but there is very much a style to parenting. People will always have differing ideas. Some people like to keep their kids in a bubble and there will be real culture shocks as the children grow older. This is the main reason I disagree with homeschooling. Children need to mix with all sorts of people to see that everyone is different. They need to see good and bad in the world. They need to make up their own minds as they grow older and make calculated decisions on their own.
I won't always agree with my childrens choices as they don't always agree with mine (generally that I AM boss of them, not the other way round) and as children become older, they need to work out what is right and wrong on their own as well through living not just through textbooks and what mum and dad say.
I know some people won't agree with me talking about drugs with my 9 year old son.
It's one of those touchy subjects on how much you can protect a child from lifes brutalities but keep them informed enough to not make bad choices.
I don't go into too much detail, I just explain that some drugs lead to stronger drugs and that people can't always give them up. When the drugs take over, the person becomes less of that person, they change and they aren't always nice people. Sometimes, drugs can kill and it's not worth getting started as it will only make too many people upset and worried about them.
I think he understands it all based on his levels of understanding.
Just what is that answer of "this is what we should do" when the subject eventually comes up, to where is that fine line of overprotecting and being to brutal and realistic with kids.
There are good and bad parents out there. There are parents that do abuse alcohol and drugs in the family home then there are those who have never touched a drop of alcohol or ever experimented with drugs. In modern society, the latter is by far in the minority.
Even I like a little much drink occasionally. It has never taken over my life and I do not drink in the home. I drink less than I used to and I may go out for a drink and socialising about once a month. It will always be when I know my kids are in good company. A grandparent babysits and will do so overnight. Sometimes we go away for the night, sometimes we come back late after a few drinks but I don't come back in a terrible state. I am no longer a teen or in my twenties and I have bigger things to worry about. I have responsibilities now that I never had when I was younger but I did enjoy my young adult years. I don't even drink in my home. Maybe 1 small bottle of beer with a curry but beyond that I don't drink at home. Even with bbq's in summer I stick to soft drinks. Why? Because if something ever happened to the kids when I was under the influence so to speak, I would never forgive myself. I have a huge sense of responsibility and should I ever have to take a child to hospital then it would not look good if mum and dad were clearly drunk. I can't do that to my kids and I'd never cope with the guilt.
Like I said, I am no perfect parent, I need time for me too so like I said I go out and enjoy myself knowing that they are in capable hands should there be an emergency. All parents need a break and to be themselves rather than just be mum and dad but it's about keeping responsible in such times.
There's so much in life we cannot control. Accidents are unforeseen incidents that cannot be avoided and there are not always reasons why certain things happen.
Back to Cory, if his death is due to an accident or a medical reason then the press should be ashamed for making such a big deal of his damaged past. Unfortunately, all too often with the media, there is no smoke without fire and all too often a small part of something has been unintentionally leaked to make more accurate story before the real cause of death is announced.
He was found deceased in his hotel room by staff after failing to check out of his room on time. The reason is yet to be discovered but the British press is very quick to jump to the previous media stories of his stints in rehab.
Of course, this could be a completely innocent. Sudden Adult Death Syndrome can happen to anyone at anytime or he could have had an underlying medical condition such as a heart defect but sadly, the way the press are reporting the story, they are very much speculating that drugs may be involved. Whether it be accidental or intentional remains to be seen as the actor also struggled publicly with depression. Again, whether it was depression that lead to alcohol and drug abuse or the other way round, we should respect that a young man has lost his life too soon.
We live in an incredibly judgemental world.
A world where it's easy to find someone else to blame, someone else to accuse and any factor for just about anything these days.
Right now his family and friends and many fans are in mourning for a young man who meant alot to them all.
It's ALWAYS easy to say you should never take drugs or drink to excess. We don't always know the reasons why people start. For some it is something they can remain strong with but for others it's a long downward spiral. It was well documented he started drinking heavily young and was in rehab for alcohol at 19, he's since been in for drugs. The last time he left rehab was just April. He had tried to get help but sadly, it looks like it wasn't enough.
Again, I repeat this may NOT be anything to do with drugs, but since I am writing this post I am proving to be just as judgemental and quick to jump to conclusions as much as everyone else. (I never said I was perfect!)
Having 3 boys, drugs is one of my main worries as they grow older. I have already spoken with Matthew today about the dangers of drugs. He's a smart boy but easily influenced. Education is a big part of prevention when it comes to the things teenagers could do. I'd rather be honest with Matthew and educate him right than to have him try things because he doesn't understand them. Yet, I don't want him to rebel and try them regardless either.
I know I am writing alot about parenting lately but there is very much a style to parenting. People will always have differing ideas. Some people like to keep their kids in a bubble and there will be real culture shocks as the children grow older. This is the main reason I disagree with homeschooling. Children need to mix with all sorts of people to see that everyone is different. They need to see good and bad in the world. They need to make up their own minds as they grow older and make calculated decisions on their own.
I won't always agree with my childrens choices as they don't always agree with mine (generally that I AM boss of them, not the other way round) and as children become older, they need to work out what is right and wrong on their own as well through living not just through textbooks and what mum and dad say.
I know some people won't agree with me talking about drugs with my 9 year old son.
It's one of those touchy subjects on how much you can protect a child from lifes brutalities but keep them informed enough to not make bad choices.
I don't go into too much detail, I just explain that some drugs lead to stronger drugs and that people can't always give them up. When the drugs take over, the person becomes less of that person, they change and they aren't always nice people. Sometimes, drugs can kill and it's not worth getting started as it will only make too many people upset and worried about them.
I think he understands it all based on his levels of understanding.
Just what is that answer of "this is what we should do" when the subject eventually comes up, to where is that fine line of overprotecting and being to brutal and realistic with kids.
There are good and bad parents out there. There are parents that do abuse alcohol and drugs in the family home then there are those who have never touched a drop of alcohol or ever experimented with drugs. In modern society, the latter is by far in the minority.
Even I like a little much drink occasionally. It has never taken over my life and I do not drink in the home. I drink less than I used to and I may go out for a drink and socialising about once a month. It will always be when I know my kids are in good company. A grandparent babysits and will do so overnight. Sometimes we go away for the night, sometimes we come back late after a few drinks but I don't come back in a terrible state. I am no longer a teen or in my twenties and I have bigger things to worry about. I have responsibilities now that I never had when I was younger but I did enjoy my young adult years. I don't even drink in my home. Maybe 1 small bottle of beer with a curry but beyond that I don't drink at home. Even with bbq's in summer I stick to soft drinks. Why? Because if something ever happened to the kids when I was under the influence so to speak, I would never forgive myself. I have a huge sense of responsibility and should I ever have to take a child to hospital then it would not look good if mum and dad were clearly drunk. I can't do that to my kids and I'd never cope with the guilt.
Like I said, I am no perfect parent, I need time for me too so like I said I go out and enjoy myself knowing that they are in capable hands should there be an emergency. All parents need a break and to be themselves rather than just be mum and dad but it's about keeping responsible in such times.
There's so much in life we cannot control. Accidents are unforeseen incidents that cannot be avoided and there are not always reasons why certain things happen.
Back to Cory, if his death is due to an accident or a medical reason then the press should be ashamed for making such a big deal of his damaged past. Unfortunately, all too often with the media, there is no smoke without fire and all too often a small part of something has been unintentionally leaked to make more accurate story before the real cause of death is announced.
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